In the Temple of a Melancholy

She was transcendent, of course 

the bending of light that brings to life words

sleep when death has awakened and a dream 

beyond the physics of the carousel

The stars are known too well for this page

they answer and answers cannot disregard from what I know

not the way that death now belongs to her

Yet long after these words have settled 

and the mind with eye-madness locks on to its cage

or the heart begs to be wearily confused

stands a man against his mountain 

searching for what he knows will never come

Just as Death smiles from His eyrie

I must find my own Gatling Thirst  

more rapid than rage, more

painful, by far but if not treasured

headstrong and willing, if

not the storm that sings its way into hell

I will become as the stone to a river

unswayed

She was transcendent, of course

a page to a wine spilled in my glass from Egyptian colored sky

Reviews

[M]

Like many, I have visited this temple on a couple of occasions but never with a gatling thirst. There is no point in raging against what is lost. Some may transcend death in our hearts and minds but no rage shall ever bring them back. Our anger and despair may be fleeting after which we need to become a ripple to a river swayed and our journey carries on. I am sorry for your loss. Your poem has done her memory justice and now she transcends all mortal words.

[Perdition]

She does at that! Mourning has a strange face and alchemy and sometimes the rage is intended as Dylan Thomas wrote it..."Do not go gentle into that good night", plus I hold my breath waiting for the next as it usually occurs. Gatling thirst for life and love was what was intended but maybe I have a little rage for what has been taken as well...but it only makes me appreciate what I have even more so not only duly noted but thank you so much for reminding me.

[Lisasview]

Hello again,
This poem was easier to read than the last one I just reviewed.
I see here that you have a couple of commas and an exclamation point... but as I said ... I have difficulty reading poems that have no punctuation.
I adored the subject matter. Life and love...
wetland of course death...
She was transcendent, of course
a page to a wine spilled in my glass from Egyptian colored sky
Probably my most favourite lines... and I am such a sucker for script and the font you used.
Lisa

Lisa

[Perdition]

Yeah, this one was honest and original so once again I appreciate all the reviews but there are some that from time to time I alter in order to try new things that don't work out and post but I adore an honest review...so once again, Thank you, Lisa!! But then again truly only the poet knows ..right? Smiles!

[Lisasview]

For sure...
Lisa

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

This is captivating. Not just the words but the feeling it vibes throughout says a lot. Deep. Poetic. Meaningful. The narrator's voic (not mine) is very clear. Tyfs

[Perdition]

Thank you for those kind words and compliments. Looking forward to reading your work as well...hope to be by soon. Cheers~

[Zola Reve]

Hi! I am new here! I am guessing you do a lot of free form. I feel that a lot of poets have a better time expressing themselves in free form. To me, in your poem, you are expressing your openness towards death, exploring the non-physical, a quaint way of acceptance, and wandering. I love it honestly.

[Perdition]

Hi Zola and welcome to the cafe...yep, I am a free-form sort of poet and this is certainly about all the aspects of love, life, and of course death as it recently came to visit..never an easy loss but we write and that seems to help. That and the previous experience with too many losses, thank you so much for visiting and for your kind words!

[Ken e Bujold]

Mr P, i do love your arresting ways with metaphors. The title of this little gem, whetted my thirst, which I then slaked with a deep dive down into the dark brooding of a mind.

a man against his mountain, Gatling thirst, singing our way into hell... sentiments i wholeheartedly understand and concur with

loved the trip as always

ken

[Perdition]

Appreciate the journey, as always, Ken and yes, without the Gatling-Thirst for life what have we really?! Thank you for reading as always~

[Chris Shaw]

In the Temple of Melancholy. A perfect title to describe the emotions I picked up on in this piece. A fabulous write I might add. She was transcendent. The repetition adds emphasis. Something lost perhaps never to be regained. Loss can be so painful.

[Perdition]

Hey! I thought once our hero returned you’d forgotten all about me… lol.
Apologies for not being by, but will have to do something about that right about now. Thank you Chris!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is an amazing piece...like something that could have been written centuries ago, or yesterday.
Death smiles and we lose someone very close to us.
I would love to wipe that smile off of his face.
j.

[Perdition]

Actually, yesterday although maybe centuries ago ya never know, ripples are strange things when they come via the collective but I'll join ya all the same. Thank you, J.