Nobody

About how life is going on how I feel about myself.

Nobody

1. I am nothing...I am not worth anything...I am a nobody.

2. I am the one who nobody wants to talk to.

3. I am the one who would do anything to change my status.

4. I am the one who would do anything to change my mistakes.

5. I am the one who would do anything to change my past.

6. But I am a nobody and no one knows me.

7. I am the one who never gets picked first.

8. I am the one who is picked last.

9. I am the one who is made fun of.

10. I am the one who is forced to put a smile on my face.

11. I am the one who has to pretend just to fit in for a little bit.

12. I am...What am I… I don’t even know anymore, No I do know who I am.

13. I am the one that people don’t notice I am the one who is disappointing at everything that I do.

14. I am everything that people hate.

15. I am the things people don’t want to see, hear or do anything with me.

16. I am...

17. Enough I am done with this I will not take this anymore, I am not who you think I am or see me as.

18. You know why because you never have taken the time to get to know me and now you might ask for an apology or may not...probably well I don’t care because I have had enough of people telling who I am  or who I should be or what I am or what I should be

19. But instead I am like that lie that comes back and bites back well I am the one who is now getting respect and people are starting to notice me and who I am really.

20. So know you might want to be friends with and start to hangout with, well guess what forget it. I wanted to be friend with you before but you never cared so know it’s time for you to know how it feels to be a nobody and why I hate what you did to me.

21. Well guess what that's over now because I have exposed you and people are starting to see that you are a nobody and that I am a somebody.

22. If only this was true you see that was my mind playing tricks on me because this would never happen to me.

23. You know why because I know that if you dream big it never happens it never has and it never will happen. But what if our roles changed and you became the nobody and I was the somebody.

24. Well when I close my eyes I can see this but that’s just pretend and I already know that pretending only works when there are other people around because if there is not then you just are fooling yourself.

25. So let’s be honest why would you want to fool yourself.

26. I know why because if we can change our perspective of your life then we feel better and we are not that nobody.

27. And to be honest I still fool myself...it’s sad really sad it’s so sad that I go to my room many days and cry of the fact that I am the nobody and that I can’t change.

28. Some days the crying hurts so much that I have thought of suicide because I don’t want to be a nobody.

29. But for some reason I am still here and now I have started to write all my words down hoping that many people will see my poems and see the way I see.

30. But hey like I said before I learned not to dream big because then it  won’t happen.

31. So many times I think to myself why do I keep on hoping for a thing that will never happen.

32. Well to be honest I have not found that answer yet and I don’t know I want to know the answer or if I want to play it safe.

33. Who am I kidding playing it safe there is no reason for me to even write my words down.

34. I don’t even know why I am still writing but maybe someday I will have a reason to why I am a nobody.

35. But I just not sure how long I can stay being a nobody because its getting hard each day like a new weight is being put on my chest and crushing me in every way both physical and mental.

36. But how can a nobody like me even keep on thinking this way.

37. Honestly I don’t know what is instore for me and what a nobody like me can do.

38. But something is telling me that it won’t be much because people say that if you start as a nobody then you will be a nobody and if you are someone the you will stay being someone.

39. And everyday I look in the mirror and ask why am I a nobody and why this unperfect nobody is even here day to day.

40. Well who knows maybe we are wrong and that a nobody may become a somebody.

41. But even for me that’s hard to believe because of how my life has been going and has gone so far.

42. So far I have felt pain from day to day and the pain never stops because perfect doesn't exist in this world.

43. That is why I want to be a somebody and not a nobody I am just finished and don’t know why I have to keep on going.

44. I am...D.O.N.E.

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

You express your feelings eloquently, so keep writing. It is a dreadful thing to have such negative feelings about yourself, but many people do. If this is a fictional write, ok but if not seek some help. Everyone is unique and every person is a somebody in my book.

Chris

[Donna]

Pete, I have read all of your poems, I am very concerned about you! Though it is good to write to get your feelings out, I can feel how much you are suffering. I'm here if you want to talk.