About Last Night.....

Overcome by strong emotions of euphoria, an overwhelming feeling of liberation, last night you opened up, this time you didn't hold back.  In doing so, I found my way into your labyrinth heart, a place where you denied me access time and time again.  What always felt like a game of hide and seek, taking yourself to a place you did not want to be found.  Skillfully using a coping mechanism that you had developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt.  You said waves of anxiety would overcome you, dragging you out to sea engulfing your every thought.  This changed in an instant when last night, you caved in.  You kept saying how it felt like being trapped in your own turmoil of pain, hurt and anger for years...now reprieved of your actions...you were able to relax and breathe.  You realised you couldn't go on like this any longer and that you had to stop running away from this powerful force of nature...your mind...which you always chose to ignore...until last night.

You opened up navigating me through a journey of rediscovery.  You held onto me so tightly as though never wanting to let me go.   Taking me to a place where intimacy had no place to hide except behind transparent walls...allowing me to see everything.  No matter which way the conversation turned what was happening could not be avoided.  You had things you needed to say, I guess we both had so much that we wanted to say, but in that very moment it wasn't about me.  They say eyes are said to be the portals to the soul.  We have always been able to see right into one another's eyes, attuned to each others thoughts, finishing each others sentences was our thing.   This time was different, I knew I had to remain quiet as I listened intently to your words as you verbalised your thoughts deep inside of mine.  When you spoke, you searched my face, needing reassurance that you could trust me...trust me enough to totally open up and confide in me.  I knew that you could, I have always been loyal to you and would never do anything to jeopardize what we have between us.  I know you knew this all along but you still needed that extra reassurance.

I could feel your breath so close to mine as though breathing your life into me....an outpouring of emotions weaving down corridors into my very being.  Igniting a deep seated passion in both of us.  Sparking feelings, relieving all your negativity as your words flowed freely.  I could smell your cologne, sending me into a tail spin.  The energy between us collided, our bodies ready to devour one another from these powerful urges felt between us leaving us both spellbound.   I became weak in your presence and breathless from your essence seeping into my very pores.  You continued to weave your way through all your pent up emotions that you had kept locked away for so long, breaking down all boundaries, leaving nothing off limits.  Letting go of the past, the anxiety and the stress that ripped through your chest...I could feel  with my hands slowly lifting.  You told me things that you had never told me before, things that made me see you in a different light.  I wasn't ready to up and leave, I needed to hear more I needed to know what made you tick.  I wanted to get right under your skin, and I did....you let me in.

You continued talking into the night expressing your thoughts so fervently with so much excitement and passion for the future.  It  was remarkable to see the shift and change in you, it was then I realised I need to speak up too,  to tell you how proud of you I am and of how far you have come and that all those many people from your past only know a version of you that no longer exists.  Most of all I need to tell you just how much you mean to me and how much I need you to know what was going on in my head.  That my life doesn't make sense without you in it.  I need to tell you I have your back just as I know you have mine and that I would go as far as laying down rose petals along the corridors of my very own labyrinth heart to help you find your way back to me. 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Sami Khalil]

Note: I love Sade and all her songs.

[Sami Khalil]

Powerful dialogue with lasting expressions. Very romantic and passionate. The journey of discovery and rediscovery were evident all over. You described an extraordinary love.

[emmajoy]

Pain, bewilderment and more in the unknown of another person is like only seeing the shell. A shell brim full with feelings of self doubt, lack of power- mental and physical. Inertia?

Your words are extraordinary, both needful but inspiring.. showing the other that you need to understand so as to help; need find a way for
an honest exchange will hope both of you. Face the same way, walk the same path if only slowly, bit by bit. Then somehow exchange, swap power from this or that gift given or throw away agreed upon. Perhaps. I felt your words, they drummed my thinking, and, perhaps have done same to you. I don't know if this post is true or not, but for sure the emotions are - true or otherwise, they mean more than the average sentence.

Take care, please.. keep safe.. always.

[hvysmker]

*Sob!* Bluuuubbbbeer. *OOOOhhhhhh*
It grabs me. Very heartfelt if true.

[Poetic Beauty]

Love is much like this many times. It is complex and gets under your skin weaving paths along guarded hearts that guide us in the right direction. Not all loves are like this. This is a once in a lifetime experience and while other loves have their own unique feel they are never embedded as deeply as the ones that meant eternally. Enjoy the sensation and the ride.

I loved many lines in this poem that speak freely and openly about anxiety and being closed off until you can’t be.