Who Knows

 

What if heaven were a tree –

Would I feel less excluded

From pious awe

If akin to squirrel, bird and bee

I could dance in leaves forever more?

 

Would I embrace the concept

Of aspiring to piety

If, instead of overwhelming skies,

Reward was more solid –

Within reach?

 

Hell, what if heaven were a tree?

Author's Note

The product of reading Emily Dickinson while thinking about my mum's newfound religion and her eagerness to press it upon others.
Didn't explore the concept very well, I know - and couldn't resist that final line - but let me know what you think. Cheers.

Reviews

[Jackie Blissett]

I liked the idea, and I liked the poem too, perhaps because I am a fan of Dickinson. i checked out some of your work, and although there are many lines I don't understand, there are also many that i do and i recognise that you are a very fine poet, a rare talent.

best wishes
Jackie

Ps. i'm English and would be interested in joining a group.
pps As long as we don't have to write poems about Gordon Brown's genitalia haha

[mick weller]

it is SO annoying when they do that...
maybe there is more of heaven in your tree than in your mum's version?
...gnostic in a way (?) a sense of knowing without learning ...
that's me full of s**t then...

[Creepy Swine Guy]

Your poem is interesting, and thought provoking. Technically, I am wondering why you chose not to punctuate it. Since you wrote it, you know where all of the stops and pauses should be. You can hear it how it's supposed to sound in your mind. We (readers) rely on punctuation to tell us these things.

As far as what you ask ... to my mind, Heaven seems no more real than that rainy day or that big payoff that your parents told you would come and that you should save for. I know NOW how real that rainy day in my future really was. I know NOW how nice that money would have been to save.

[Gandré]

this is a totally sweet poem. short and cute and deep, extremely satisfying.

[Hedra Helix]

hahaha,
funny that 'I' should read this one, I do think heaven is tree like! Only more glowy, and With God hanging around going, geez I cant believe you made it kid, good Job!

I think heaven is treelike simply for the fact that like life the more you sink root, the more you give your solidarity proof- the higher you go. The more you take the sun same as rain looking at the cycles as natural rather than petty game, the more you integrate with the wild, hold still stay patient, the bigger you get, the more sure of your space you are the more creatures you can offer care for. You get bigger, more majestic, you become undeniable, beautiful for your mere existence.

Which I think is the fleeting thing we all fear to loose, { beauty in our mere existence} which we chase that takes us away from heaven daily- from the path that can lead us to true centered peace within ourselves, knowing we are on our rightous way through this earthly life.

Diggg this.
Shoot root, bear fruit!

[Tamme]

I like your concept and it made me think

If heaven were a tree, would our souls resemble monkeys? Stuffing our faces with bananas and tossing fecal matter at one another.

[F. Nazarov]

I suppose you would.
I had to reread it a couple of times then think about it.
It's an interesting question... what if heaven were a tree?
That's some good stuff C.
I wouldn't be able to resist the last line either. :D

[Ed Hart]

if I say "no comment" you might wonder why I wasted this "review" space, the same way I might wonder how you didn't know that heaven is a tree to a termite...

[Rain]

Hummmmm, I wonder if I'd want to be a squirrel, or a leaf. lol. One skips around the skirts of heaven, one is a part. Interesting. Rain..

[zig]

"Hell, what if heaven were a tree?"

yeah, and if god were just a bluejay, and all of eternity an afternoon in horseshoe park, what if all the unknown could be held in our hands and still be unknown... but in the palms of our hands!! yeah, i like that, hell i like that alot.

zig