Icebreaker

An essay on group facilitation games.

Recently I had to partake in an activity called an icebreaker. Disappointing enough this doesn’t involve ice or breaking anything. The idea of these group facilitation games is that by getting to "know each other" it will make everyone work better as a team and avoid awkward introductions. Fortunately I had been forced to sit through a couple of these before so I knew what I was letting myself in for. This is what happens when you start a new job, join a scout group, enter a new school etc. people want to find out what you’re like. Then silently groan and look awkwardly away when you mention an interest/ lifestyle choice of yours that they either despise or never heard of before. So you can then either tell your peers random trivia about yourself or be one of those mysterious types who gives nothing way. Typical conversation goes like this.

Question: “So what do you do in your spare time?”

Answer: “I like music and hanging out with my friends.”

Personally I think an interest in music unless a really weird dying genre i.e. Classical or psychedelic rock shouldn't be used as a defining personality trait if you are trying to “break the ice” so to speak. For the simple reason that everybody likes music. I even know deaf people who like music. If you don’t like music you’re in the minority.

Neither should hanging out with friends count as an icebreaker answer. If you say “I like hanging out with friends” it sounds there is something sad and or desperately wrong with you. For starters who doesn't like seeing their friends and secondly hanging out sounds like you lounge around smoking dope in your spare time.

Whether you’re the type of person who tells all to strangers or prefers to have an air of mystery about you, there can be awkward moments in new encounters. The flip side however, is that these situations can make you examine yourself in an almost outer body experience kind of way, and in a society over populated by heavily crafted social media profiles this can’t be a bad thing. What I mean by this is that we manipulate our online persona’s in order to make ourselves look better for others and for our own egos, but that’s not who we really are. What you discover is there is more to you than materiel items, pop references, friends, family, experiences and life skills. You are an amalgamation of all these things combined, but behind the mask you are greater than these imprints. You are you. You are a snowflake. A burning star. The sad smile of the Mona Lisa. You feel all these emotions and sometimes all at the same time, but only you experience your own peripheral version and interpretation of events. No one in the world feels the same way you do about all these things.

The so you have it, those who tell you too much, those who tell you nothing, then you have my favourite group. The people who make stuff up. Weirder the better. This can range from “I like travelling” but have never been on an aeroplane to “I like professional tennis” but have never heard of Roger Federer. These people make s**t up to impress you and other complete strangers. It’s deception but at the same time hilarious.

So now it prompts the vitally important question:

Who really wants to share something?