Forgotten Title

I have forgotten more than I ever knew I knew if I knew it at all.

A mind full of pockets of nothing,
memories riddled with h les,
thoughts bro ken and fra g mented,
sentences that. before the period,
conversations becoming snippets of words.

Communication ... not my ... suit.

Author's Note

there are no errors that are not intentional here (that I know of)

Reviews

[Amelie]

Awesome structure you got there. Experimental in the safest sense. The first line pulled off the everything else though it seemingly sounded a bit awkward for others. But it didn't let the piece suffer, there's a perfect resonance and your inventiveness was damn sick.

[Owlgirl]

Hmm, this one leaves hings to ponder over in the mind. Great job, though, it's very ell written adn has a nice flow.

[Corset]

I think it's the word nothing that is throwing people off on the concept you are trying to convey, which is "void" , holes threw me at first to, perhaps something there to let them know a letter is missing h_les, third line conveys perfectly and I love how you portrayed that to us, sentences that end before the period, good I think, the rest readily understandable, awesome work!

[The Pain Stays Fresh]

I disagree with Maidahl and GunMetal. I think the first line sounds good the way it is. I do see a few errors. You've left out the 'o' in 'holes'. I'm also confused as to why there is a period in the middle of the fourth line. It's really good overall though and like the rest of your poetry, something I can relate to. I love it's short simplicity. Well done. :)

[Rachael Day]

I like the concept of this poem. It's a cool way to structure it. Maybe add some more..make it a little longer??

[GunMetal]

Once I realized what was happening here, it blew my mind. How incredibly inventive! Seriously, this s**t is dope. I agree with maidahl about changing the first line to "A mind full of nothing pockets". Otherwise it's perfect. It's short but not at all incompl

[Jazmen]

this was really interesting to read. I actually said "break" in my mind when I was reading "sentences that. before the period,"
And I like the concept. I just wrote something that reminds me of what you've conjured up here.
Nice work.

[Kuhr Gred]

thoughts bro ken and fra g mented, --> that's nice.. ahha.. feel like broken i actual ;) btw.. it is great.. thanks for sharing
- Kuhr Gred

[~LadyWolf~]

Very nice!

[Destinyxi]

Haha, this is an awesome poem. Very creative. Love how you left out the o in holes. And spread out the words broken and fragmented to enforce the meaning of the words. Nice original write

[Lily Mae]

If we know or maybe for me I know nothing... waiting for words myself.. Excellent write and I love the creativity... xo