Faded

Faded

A Poem by Shhhh
"

broken

"
Broken
My pendulous heart yearns for you
A thousand poniards mutilating my lamenting soul
Faded memories linger 
Like the sweet pungent aroma of your hair
I am lost, 
Encrusted by the constant visions of you standing right by me
Pangs, a miserable malevolence
Without you, my life has become opaque
Faded 
Gone

© 2013 Shhhh


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Featured Review

A good write about yearning that is heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free verse which I enjoy. Nice use of simile. Deep expression of emotion; you express the feelings of loss as the color of life has faded. Good word choice as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance. Well penned. Write on!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Shhhh

10 Years Ago

Thanks for returning the favor Shelley. It really means a lot. :D
ShelleyA

10 Years Ago

You're welcome.



Reviews

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Meg
Beautifully written, it overflows with pain and sadness. The only thing I can say is that 'encrusted' feels like the wrong word in this context. I would suggest something more along the lines of enveloped, or something. Otherwise, gorgeous and eloquently written

Posted 10 Years Ago


Find Frieda P. You two would get along most fabulously

Posted 10 Years Ago


Shhhh

10 Years Ago

Aha I've read many of her pieces and think she is an amazing writer. I haven't sent a request yet wh.. read more
Annabelle Lee

10 Years Ago

You guys are very similar
every phrase you did invoked such passion, albeit sad and grief stricken. well the musings of the heart need to expressed. good job in letting the reader have a piece of your mind.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Shhhh

10 Years Ago

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I'll definitely look into your pieces as well. :)
A good write about yearning that is heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free verse which I enjoy. Nice use of simile. Deep expression of emotion; you express the feelings of loss as the color of life has faded. Good word choice as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance. Well penned. Write on!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Shhhh

10 Years Ago

Thanks for returning the favor Shelley. It really means a lot. :D
ShelleyA

10 Years Ago

You're welcome.

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280 Views
4 Reviews
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Added on June 29, 2013
Last Updated on June 29, 2013

Author

Shhhh
Shhhh

CA



About
My name is Kevin. I am 16 years old, however, age is no matter when it comes to writing. Writing is my life along with dance. I write about anything to my heart's content. If you wish for me to review.. more..

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