Why did you have to Go...

I've tried to call, but you've said nothing at all.

And while I wait and fret, all I know is that you're not here, not even in sight, for I have tried to call, but their was no reply at all...

Why am I in shambles, blinded by the sight of reality, so light tempered? 

I've barricaded the door, no I do not want to sleep anymore, I'll quiver like I did before.

So hungry, angry, and so frightened, what if my existence was never meant to be without you near, you're not here!

But its alright, I'll cope when you're back... back from that place I never wanted you to be, that was the place that gave you empathy, you said it made you strong, made you honoured to be who you are.

I say that place makes you become who you think you should be, that place is for people who take chances, but don't you see... you can't do that to me!

Nothing is explicit... You live, you love, you fight and 'you' come back.

You don't do everything you've done without word or call that you're not living, or worse. That you won't come back. 

Am I deranged? For I am now in your closet, looking at the traces of existence that you were not once a dream.

I hate it, I hate you. You've left me here, and I do not know what to do.

And as I sweep my hands across your clothes, I come across a suit... its your spare.

Messy green prints enter my eyes like knives.

Oh, and that's when it hits me, the enormity of it sinks in once again, snap back I tell myself, snap back to normality.

Adrenaline, adrenaline... adrenaline rush.

Why won't you come? Why won't you let this peace be cussed?

After all this writing, crying, this screaming... the pen, that writes on paper that shakes like the rice in African rain sticks, allows me to write a single and most proper letter:

"Are you well, my sweet? You seem gone, gone more now, than you will ever seem in my unstable future. 

        You know I miss you... but don't you ever forget it."

Author's Note

I started writing this poem about half a year ago... And stuck with it.
I really hope that it is clear enough, as people have criticized me of that in previous poems. Enjoy it! :)

Reviews

[K.Delaney]

Wah, that is good stuff! As someone else pointed out some grammar mistakes i.e their rather than there. Very gripping and intense, as I read i was totally drawn in, didn't even notice my cell ringing! XD Great job!

Have you ever considered trying to write a stream of consciousness piece? They are neat, this sort of gave me the impression that you could make a very thrilling one. Again good job!

[Luke Ritta]

Very, very good....great work.....really liked this!

[Chris]

It was very well said... one minor confusion for me -

"Are my deranged? - "Are" or Am?

You put a living face upon dependency... again, well done.

Chris

[Stella]

Wow ! I am blown away by how amazing your poem is! This is absolutely brilliant and you must be extremely talented to have written this at the age of 15.

[Cosmic Dreamer]

You are an amazing poet. Reading any of your work inspires me, and makes me respect you even more. I hope that you get the credit you deserve for being such a brilliant poet.

[Jaco (Jaik Miller)]

Girl you are so good. I really respect you as a poet. Exactly this happened to me recently. I just randomly got on here and created an account so i think was supposed to talk to you and read your poems.

[ShameemAkhtar]

You cannot be 15 and write like this :)

One or two grammatical mistakes but other than that very good. I can see that portrayed in a musical drama piece...

Keep it up