Less

Depression and psychosis leave dismembered memories, every passing December.

Under the cold sky brotherless I confide like a butterfly in goodbyes until sunrise, prizeless

I follow the footsteps of my betters, competitive with the remedy to eventually be better than this

I rain tears like rough weather, falling rotting under the weight of a feather, forgotten like a red leaf

Creeping to the ground, to be found resonating in the sound of decay, waste my life away

Only going down on this elevator to hades obsidian, oblivion civilizations built on hatred

Live brief, no release, seep insanity running from my hands again like sand through few fingers

The pain lingers, the passion sings, the world rings in my head like a dead memory, record beat on repeat

Clean my face of acne, mask my fantasy, collapse inhumanity, humility grows frigid under the sigil religionless

Physical scars bar my windows tight, ready for the bloodletting fight slighted and spiteful

Broken glass passes through my veins, mashed potatoes and pills, disdain a tornado in my brain

Rightfully delighted to watch the sunrise on the night sky splintered winter figureless skating dominated

They will never be resurrected in this matrix, the tombstone holds the spirit, the rhythm moulds the lyrics,

Patriarchy disembarking pulling me apart into a million pillaged pieces of a pilgrimage,

Commitment sits well at the gates of hell, patiently waiting for Nirvana an island in an ocean of debauchery

Coal burns sulfuric, God mocks the marks on my heart a perishing phoenix, bearing no merit, divorce is my marriage

War my miscarriage of eradication; the world is impatient persecuted for imagination annihilated

The white snow shades my hatred, jaded bulletproof saviours are never gonna save me

Raving with the crazy phrasing I try to create unamazing, demonstrated, acclimated, evidentially

Fucked up mentally, less healthy than a mouse on mickeys, liquid flickers through my veins like a lighter

Cyanide glides by my blind side luminous fire ludicrous ominous desire, promises comical

Bottomless, and orbited pollinated soullessness, petals fell from heaven to hell

There is no end to a dead life, there is no light at the end of the tunnel, hell isn’t underground

I emit my fear, kindred embittered witness to the acknowledgment that it’s legit felt around us

Less than my sovereign bomber of a souvenir cosmically farming my clear cut forest of resources

Remorseless as this hoarse sore throat spits another silver wad sodomized in the summer sun

Persevere before you disappear in the rinse of innocence and purity

Look in the mirror at searing sincerity, one day away from death's destiny

Burning vulgarity is the only furious being that stares back at me, I only see disease, dominating

Merely merry with my sanity, carrying the harsh weight of all this hate

My own spark is all dark marks of humanity that swallow me, scars eating hollowly at the flesh, godless

Look at a martyr see, a person of society, see, a prophet of sobriety, bleed poison ivy,

Grow torture, a morbid flower of ivory from my pores, dead inside the mind but it’s only me, only irony

Only less, regression reborn a testament as the sentimental memories left my corpse, cordial, disembodied lovingly

God looks down frowning above me, I said f**k you to the high almighty heavens praying on death’s cycle, an iron scythe lifeless

Where were you when I died? Did the sun dry my mangled cadaver so much that you forgot who I was?

Did it ever matter? Ripe to harvest in that carnage, parting ways with yesterday, disciples of your rifles

A demon of the true humans, it’s a beautiful view before you shatter to glass on the sidewalk by the road pass

What was my carcass, what was this cold course through hopelessness for, why did I walk that road alone, with no hand to hold?

Running through the ever closing corridors that crushed my wings in celebration, cremated on the wind, air conditioning

Less than a liability, a syllable vigilant for a death sentence, but I can’t spell out even one word further

Fucked by the birds that deserted me, a flock of crows, at the end of the rainbow, my heart froze

The sky snowed people parts, outside the dark horizon of my hospital window, they carted bodies

Widowed children fragile like an egg precariously dropped softly from my window

To splatter scrambled on the grey Hamilton sidewalk like another cigarette

To forget I had wings in the first place, remade solitude

Cocatris, proclamations of silence crying fire

A chick rancid in love’s remains

Caged to never fly again

Less than an insect

Less than here

Less than

Them

You

I

Author's Note

I very seldom reply to reviews, but I promise I read EVERY single one. I look forward to my next review because it helps me learn. Even if it's just one word, I promise, I will be ecstatic to have the chance to hear what you have to say. Whenever you write something about my poems, or the themes of my poems, or criticize me it is not in vain. I will listen, learn and be thankful.

Reviews

[LazerRays]

oh, i can def relate. Mental health does give this a better taste. I find writings like these rather interesting and great to read. This had all the best ingredients; mainly disturbing :D ahhhh, my Skull brother, I enjoyed this very much!

-Team Rocket Member Sarah

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

Thanks Sarah, your boy numb-skull jack loves dark poems, and exploring my past, I realized I have a lot more to share. You definitely expect more poems soon!

PS: I got a concussion, but once I'm better, we can collab if your up for it. I always love your poetry, I think we'd make a great team. I still don't have any ideas for the theme though.

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

*Can definitely I mean

[LazerRays]

yeah! lets collab! hope your head gets better soon :P

[Pete]

my-oh-my. such strong, disturbing, troubling imagery. you've captured the feel so well - perhaps too well. great accompanying pic. i quite liked this one. nice work ... :)

'Broken glass passes through my veins, mashed potatoes and pills, disdain a tornado in my brain
Rightfully delighted to watch the sunrise on the night sky splintered winter figureless skating dominated

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

I'm glad you enjoyed it. I couldn't ignore the fact that a part of me died in a way at one point, so I figured I'd share how it felt. This is one of my best poems yet in my opinion. I just wanted to share the pain of losing control, and being trapped in a situation that you don't deserve. A situation where you are powerless, and live from day to day suffering. The medication they put me on in that place had adverse affects and nearly killed me. To me, part of me died and was buried in that mausoleum of a hospital.

[Pete]

great job. i'm sorry to hear all of that. keep your chin up. you're strong to make it through and for being able to share it with others. there's a purpose for everything under the sun ... :)

[Ghost writer]

I didn't like this one very much, the flow was good, and I get the feeling, of disappearing inside yourself, falling into insanity and knowing it, but the complete anger and God, I don't like that, I get that it's truthful, at times like that people do get angry at God, but I just respect poems less when they don't show, some kind of resolve. I know sometimes there is just no hope, but to broadcast that seems unnecessary. Other then that I think the concept is good.

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

I understand, it's about my two and a half years spent in hospital for mental illness. I wasn't allowed outdoors for weeks or months at a time. I lost weight, gained weight, and lost it again, and became quite sickly. I lost my ability to run, write music, and I lived with other people who were just as unhappy as myself. One's who often tried to escape, mistreated each other, and the staff and security there were down right cruel. I lost everything when I came out of that hospital. I know it's good to show hope, but in this case, there was no victory. Only pain, and PTSD that came with it. I barely talked for several years after that. And the things that happened there were unspeakable.

[Ghost writer]

I'm very sorry that happened to you, and I get how you might not appreciate it but God really would help if you asked and if you try. Again though I understand how hard that could be, sorry for your losses.

[wordman]

lot of things to think bout in this write,loved the image

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

Thanks, I enjoyed writing the poem, I'm glad you enjoyed reading it.

[wordman]

you`re welcome