Permanently Altered State of Mind in a Mind Not Seeking Permanent Alteration

Set aside your sense of normality
Wake up feeling like another
He who is not you has come to surface
Startling, disappointing; distressing, curious.

Mirror
Paralleled to the true self
I can see you, yet I cannot
You are lost to me, yet so within reach.

I have failed somehow
This error: can it be fixed?
Am I lost to my own self forever?
I will find my way back. I must.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

"Am I lost to my own self forever?
I will find my way back. I must."
I understand the poem and the statement above. Aging seem to kill off old self and we cannot find and know what we once needed and wanted. This is good poetry. Make the reader think and ponder on many things. I don't know if we can find our way back. Some mazes are for us to stay permanently lost and confused. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Solitary Traveler]

Your poetry is so complex, turned in, turned out, and upside down, that I feel I miss the point most times. To what I read into it, you've lost yourself, and feel like a stranger in your own body. Might have missed the mark. After marriage, I realized that I'm not myself anymore. Finding out who I am again. Are you wanting to be yourself again, or is this a state you're just gonna say "F**k it, I am still me."?

[Akira Kodama]

This was written a while back when, after I did a certain hallucinogenic drug, I felt off. At first, I had thought it was just the after effect, like the hangover, of the drug. But it persisted beyond the amount of time it would take for any drug's effects to completely wear off. I felt very off, and my sense of self was not as it had been before. It eventually went away, I think because of some external stimuli, but I was quite scared and wrote this in the middle of that crisis.

[MAC]

this is perfect! one of the best introspective writes that I've ever come across. Into my favs!

[Akira Kodama]

Thank you. I'm glad you liked it so much.

[Corset]

you can be so tender at times, the reaching softens hard stares, and other times almost starkly cruel and that is confusing, which one are you? you have no enemies in my pockets only buzzing angry bees that sting with no real reason other than my mouth moves, at least none that I am fully aware, we aren't in your mind with you, I only hear bits and pieces.

[Akira Kodama]

I'm supposed to be one or the other?

[Corset]

well, that's a fair question I guess but consistency is helpful when dealing with others.

[Akira Kodama]

I'm a moody person. I write for f**k's sake, isn't every writer fucked up?

[Corset]

yes, I do believe I agree with you.

[Corset]

to a certain degree, anyway.

[Akira Kodama]

When one is angry do they not get more excited? Sometimes "cruel"? Sadness usually is associated with negative calmness.

[Corset]

no, he shouldn't condemn himself at all, especially in the one place he can be most honest with himself...and yes they are, nor should he be judged for it, and I'm pretty sure Indigo here can speak for himself...unless he /she is. In that case, I believe you are right also my point being he laments loneliness yet growls at approach, I was just curious since he is on my friends list.

[Akira Kodama]

I disagree with you. I don't think lament loneliness, per se. When it comes to those I am close to, I do. However I don't know how you got into this, considering this writing is about and only about myself. Nobody else.

[Corset]

I didn't get into this, I was just relating to it...as people do with poetry.

[Akira Kodama]

But you addressed me?

[Yellow Butterfly]

Your words here are profound and very raw...

Brave write...

YB

[kris reed]

Nice poem! It reminds me of times when I've been really sick and have become a distant stranger to my own body.

[MOON]

Poignant write , love how the first stanza flows into the second . the loss of the self.

[Akira Kodama]

Thanks for reading. What's depicted in this writing sadly has happened to me over the past few days. I don't feel right. I don't know how many people have felt like this, at least without the influence of drugs. I feel like that's the reason rather than natural causes. But I don't know. Like whilst typing this I don't even feel right. Like what I am typing is unnecessary, but why does it matter? F**k it.

Thanks for your input here. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[MOON]

Go well my friend !

[Akira Kodama]

Thank you.