The start of it all, Forever will i hate the man in the stupid red truck.

Waking up that morning was probably the hardest thing, I had ever had to do. The nightmares of the night still running around my head. Everything wrong about life, packed inside my brain. This was a sad time, and everyone, everything seemed to know, Little did i know, they day would get worse.
  I pulled myself out of bed and sighed. Looking at myself in the mirror on my wall. My make up made raccoon eyes around my eyes from all of the crying, and the late night in the hospital with my best friend Gracie, who could barely comprehend what was going on..  And then we lost her.
I slowly and gradually started my day.
Bathroom to Pee,
Brush Hair, Pull Back
Brush teeth,
Back to Room,
Get Dressed,
Breathe
Leave for Bus.
Not Even bothering with make up, or looking nice.
the chances of me being able to stay the whole day at school, would be rare.
Standing there at the bus stop and looking across the road made a knot in my stomach. Tears already streaming down my cheeks, As well as all of the kids around. Most of the other kids at the bus stop huddled in a crying circle. I knew I could never join, For I would cry even more seeing everyone else cry.
 When the bus arrived everyone slowly inched too it. Probably all of our thoughts the same, We all wanted to see Gracie on the bus,  had gotten hit by a car at her bus stop yesterday morning and died.
 I did die a little inside, Not seeing my best friend on the bus that morning and I hoped she'd be okay, in the big place she called 'heaven'. I sat down alone and pulled my knees up to my chest. There was no one to talk to, no one to even look at, and so i forced myself to sleep. Waking up with a gasp a few minutes later as we hit a speed bump turning into the school's bus loop. The tears immediately down my face as I thought about what had happened to Gracie. The man in the stupid red truck that hit her, and killed her.
Everyone shuffled off the bus and I slowly walked to my second period block day. Something i would have done with Gracie. Which made me twitch. I had two out of three classes with her today. Could I handle this today? I shouldn't even be here,  My best friend just died, I should be at home. Or with her parents and her family. Not here at this cold school. But, Mother and Father made it very clear i couldn't miss another day of school. I have a feeling they never liked Gracie much.

 Instead of heading straight to class i went to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall and put the seat down fully do i could sit. My jacket hood went over my head and I bit the sleeve of my jacket and screamed into it. Well, as far as i knew i had screamed. It felt like it, but i couldn't hear it. The walls of the bathroom stalls seemed to melt and i was scared. Scared that not only I lost my best friend. but also my mind. Everything had happened so quickly. It's not like Gracie

was sickly. If anything, she was the healthiest person i had ever met. Always so bright and cheery, never did she frown and only cried during sad parts in movies. It should have been me, the little atheist girl, not the preachers daughter. I was worried for her family, without a doubt.

  I sat in the bathroom and cried for what seemed like hours and the morning announcements of our sad little middle school rang in. This was my last year here. 'Good Morning Lake Ship Middle!' And from there i tuned the rest out. I didn't want to hear the fake happiness, and the fake sadness that came when they talked about Gracie. I put my headphones in my ears and cried, my head against the stall.
 Now, there was one good thing about the building four, eighth grade hallway bathrooms. The teachers, never went in there. Hell, I don't think anyone really went in there. So i could be in peace, or well in this case, pieces. I listened to Peirce the Veil until 9:25. When the reminder bell rang. I got up, and wiped my eyes, heading to class. P.E.
 I didn't dress out that day and I was sat on the track because of it.Which was nice, because there was no way i would be able to run, or even walk the track now. Coach Kurt was one more sob away from sending me to the Library for what they called 'Therapy' but i knew it was just a bunch of kids, who didn't even know her that just wanted to get out of class. All claiming that she was there best friend, or fake stories of how they hung out on the weekends. Which was a lie, because for the past  five years, since she moved here, we have been with  each other   every weekend. Never skipping one. I guess i knew it was bound to end eventually.
 Once P.E. Ended, I had geography, and as soon as i walked into the door, she sent me out and to the library. But i didn't go. I took my book bag and sat outside, taking an unused  notepad out and flipping to the first page.
   'Rule number one with coping without your best friend: Don't go to 'therapy' It is nothing but guidance counselors hugging people, who probably didn't even know your best friend in the first place, and just wanted to get out of class.'
  I jotted down, This was the beginning, My guide to coping without your best friend by your side.

I wrote it on the cover and sniffled slightly, a small smile. She would like this, She would want me to do this.
  'Rule Number Two; Never trust a man in a red truck. They are nothing but pure trouble and sadness.'
 Gracie probably wouldn't like that one. I could just hear here now.
"Letty, He didn't mean to.."

And I swiped the thought away and the name 'Letty.' It was what she called me because i refused to be called 'Scar' by anyone other than my father. Who said it with his New York accent that made it better, but only a tad.
  I set the notepad in my book bag and went early to my sixth block. Since it was block day, I'd come straight from Geo to here.. So i sat on the wooden table outside the art room and pulled my knees up to my chest. I looked at the sky over the school and it looked horrible. Like the sky was about to explode with as any tears as I had shed, and I watched it start to sprinkle and then start to pour down with such force that in only a few minutes, the ground was soaked and the gutters were pumping out water and i watched, and knew the sky was sad too, and nothing could make it better either.
  Everythign was so weird now and I sighed, And took out the note pad again.Thinking over things in the best way possible. This was going to be a hard near start to summer, and a even worse beginning to high-school.