Evermore the Storm

This one is my perspective on a broken heart that is not my own, but I apply it to my own point of view. Making a third party observation and injecting it into a first person perspective.

Evermore the Storm

Can you sing that same song?
The one that I've been longing to sing
Tell me these feelings, are they wrong
To want your love to take me under your wing

Dream away the pain
Consistency of the rain
Wet, soft, comforting to know
That these tears will never show

The storm rages on, why can't we get past this
You know the love is there but untouchable and faint
If it were possible to grant, this would be my wish
The world to be a canvas for the two of us to paint

You're not here, that much I've been told
But why can't my heart seem to let you go
The memories like ink, splayed across the pages like a fine art
I can't see the future where we joined could finish our part

At this point it's no secret what your life meant to me
But how many know of the love that will never be
And all the words I ever heard you say
Are evermore in my life, evermore to stay

Watch my life from so far away that I can't feel
All the love, all the sadness that each day will bring
Keep my life, from crown to heel
To serve as your reminder that every time they sing

It's my soul, my words, my pain, they memorize
It's the love that was lived and lost in your eyes

Singing all together, the chorus they know by heart
Is the only reason I live, keeping you and I apart
The crowd weeping with me, trying to understand my life
Is my motivation to keep strong and battle through the strife

So I will write and I will compose
For you, I revive this ever fading rose
Evermore the tempest so warm
Evermore, yes, Evermore the Storm

Author's Note

Please, tell me what you think about this. Yes i do change the rhyme scheme a bit in this, but that was intentional. Constructive criticism welcomed.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Sadness runs through your words, truly 'wanting you to find hope and strength to keep going into a wonderful life.

There are some great stanzas in this, some great lines but found the erratic meter spoiled the flow. You have amazing heart and potential but maybe need some inspiration. May I suggest you find both a book of modern and traditional poetry and slowly read through them aloud - pick out what catches your eye or the themes you feel you'll enjoy.

Many thanks for sharing.