Mistress

There's nothing worse than a mans angry mistress

It’s funny how you can mean everything to someone than the next day mean nothing. Life was full of people like that, with conflicted emotions, hard in the pants and not in the heart. It doesn’t really seem to matter until they mean the world to you, but once they leave it feels almost like… something is missing. You can’t change their feelings or thoughts, even though everyone wants to be able to do that. To be able to feel the one you love, hold their hand everyday, love them without worries in the back of your head. I always hated complications which eventually led me away from them, although he was an exception. He made me feel things I had never felt before, things I tried to stay away from my whole life and every minute of it was… life changing. He also made me feel like I was crazy, aching, like I should be the one who felt guilty. I didn’t care if I was insane or not, as long as I had him the world was endless.

His wife thought the best of him. He was her angel from above. Her one true love. She wasn’t as good to him as I was, coming home late nights, only doing what she wanted. The nights he was with her were the worst. I was completely alone, driven to sit in my apartment in front of my phone waiting hours for his call. He never called when she was around, he would always call the next day, and oh did he make up for it. I would like to think he spoiled me more than his wife, I knew he cared about me more than her. He always had that glisten in his eye when he was around me and I knew how much he cared. Nights when they fought and she wasn’t around were the best day’s of my life. Continuously devoted to me, making me feel like I was his wife, minus the ring. 

But things got dark real fast. He wanted to end it all, acting like I meant nothing to him, telling me his wife was suspicious and more important. Like I believed that. I knew right then he had fallen in love with me, he had taken the safe route out and wanted to ignore me, to hide his feelings. I was better than that. Agreeing to never see him again was probably the hardest thing I ever had to do. War had soon set off in my head and I found myself in front of his door some nights hoping he would just open it and hug me like all those times before. My sleeping habits, well I didn't sleep, in fact my obsession for him prevented me from ever closing my eyes. That’s when I knew enough was enough. Something had to change. 

My leg now tangled with his while my other tangled with his bed sheets. Soft, lavender, and silk just how I remembered. I couldn’t hold back a smile at how this all turned out. I was in his wife’s white lingerie my fingers interlaced with his, my other hand stroking his brown hair. A quick little laugh escaped my lips looking down at his wife’s ring on my left band finger and looking at his wife lying on the ground begging for her life. My head hit his chest again as I turned away from her to look at him. His body was still warm like before and the gloss in his eye were still there when he looked at me. 

“I forgive you” I whispered placing a kiss on his pink lips before pulling away to see the bullet hole in-between his eyes. “I love you” I smiled pulling out the gun I had done the crime with from under me. With my other hand I pulled away from his grip, sitting up and getting off of the bed where MY husband Lied. My feet tapped on the hard wood floor blocking out the screeching noises his w***e made. My feet finally reached her body hitting the rope that tied her up. I placed the gun to her heart and pulled the trigger. She wasn’t as good to him as I was.  

Reviews

[RileyRedding]

What a soap-opera of raw emotion you have here.
Your opening line was fantastic as it rounded out the theme of the story while provoking the reader to answer a fantastic question.
How can someone who you mean everything to, wake up and feel nothing for you?
How can you become a ghost in the life of your soulmate without even having a falling out?
Granted those two questions are a variant of what your opening lines inspire, but it's a broad theme.
I digress, love can make us a psychotic.
There's something even shockingly provocative about how love can push us to the brink, something animalistic, something primal.
I really enjoyed this piece. Other authors might have tackled this in a way that was tirelessly campy, or cliche, but you tackled it with both maturity and poise.

[Clay Feet]

Really well-written. I enjoy the flow of the story and the turn from mistress to murderer. My only caution is for you to learn the difference between "then" [time] and "than" [comparison}. I saw one typo that's easy to correct: "His body was still warm like before and the gloss in his eye were still there when he looked at me." "gloss in his eyes was still..." BTW, I make grammatical mistakes frequently, so I'm only pointing to those that are obvious to me. You were good for this story. The compactness and scope are engaging. Your writing skill is excellent.

[Elwyn]

This is an AMAZING story! I was hooked with every line! The concept is Strong, raw and the execution is painfully flawless (a killer combination, if you will!). Just one teensy mistake; I think you meant "days" instead of "day's" in the second paragraph.

Also, consider different word choice in the last paragraph. This narrator is obviously deranged and thus it wouldn't make sense for her to recognize her actions as a "crime".

The gun description is also unnecessary. The bullet-hole in his heed was already mentioned thus the "done the crime with" bit is redundant. your reader is able to infer that detail.

I think the "hard in the parts but not in the heart" line is particularly clever.

All in all, this mini story is creepy, disturbing, entertaining, well-written and over-all incredible! I'm insanely impressed!

[Don't just B, but B ama..]

Very well written and great analogies, "hard in the pant and not in the heart" LOL loved that line, although he had to have a hard heart to cheat on his wife in the first place, and then break hers instead of leaving his wife. Then again any affair becomes a situation like two people fell asleep tight in each others arms with a whole bottle of maple syrup, and honey between them. Then waking up, it is but a severely, STICKY MESS.
Great piece, seductive, destructive, and sexy, with a powerful unexpected ending, to it all. Nice work, fun read.

[tess]

Thank you once again!!! Although to any reasonable person he was cold/hard hearted but to her he was everything, to her he was sweet and although he didn't love her she thought he did. Kind of twisted! I will read and comment on your stuff when I have the time btw! thanks again for reading!!!!

[Don't just B, but B amazing!]

Yes love can be blinding, great work.