Erosion

Some words have been chipping away at me for several years.

Drip ...
Droplets loitered long ...

Drip ...
And finally fell ...

Drip ...
Before dawdling across the rugged surface.

Each traveled along the same craggy,
Barely visible path across ancient granite.

There was a gradual, unseen wearing away.
One by one, tiny bits of rock were carried
Off by tiny streams of trickling water.

Pooling in areas of subtle depression,
Regrouping and forming more fluid streams.

These tiny streams etched subtle swaths
Along the paths of least resistance,
All the while, whittling diligently away.

Soon the tiny streams were babbling brooks
Tumbling over large stones that had been
Chiseled away from the massive rock face.

Eventually, your words are a raging river,
ripping yawning canyons through the granite
that was once my soul. I am a gaping chasm.

Reviews

[Kristina Moulaison]

Well this took my breath away, literally there at the end. Such vivid imagery, so aptly descriptive of this depth of emotion. Such beautiful, powerful words delivered with such subtle and nuanced precision. This is just so good. Definitely one of my favorites.

[Creepy Swine Guy]

Thank you Misty dear, I found myself not liking a few little things. I tweaked the last stanza, changed the title and now I like it much better.

[Kristina Moulaison]

What was the last stanza before please?

[Creepy Swine Guy]

It didn't reference "words" ... which was sort of an important reference for the poem.

[Kristina Moulaison]

Oh, okay. I didn't read it before that. Don't change it any more!

[Pete Langley]

Building the analogy line by line makes this fugue of feeling so effective.
Your use of water, from drip to torrent, as the corrosive, is a perfect medium.
Superb. P.

[Doreen]

Love your photos. Nice touch. I like the metaphor. The description is spot on, and the last tercet delivers the emotion dead on.
The auto capitalization in the lines threw me off.

[Norma M Sutton]

I love it. Possibly Paths of Least Resistance? Or something similar?

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

the whole metaphor is breathtaking. i'm blown away by the idea of this.. and that final stanza gives goosebumps right when i hit the final line. intense.. that suckerpunch ending is unexpected and tremendously impactful

[just rose.]

I like the precision, the taoist metaphor that shows, in the penultimate lines, the honing/destruction/change. well done.

[Phibby Venable]

this is beautiful and strong - it is sad how people seldom allow each other
to change or recognize needs. Even love can wear away.

(the mills of the gods grind slowly, but they grind exceedingly small )

[Ed Hart]

that's exactly how it's done, the first time...later on, they can do it much faster...a wonderfully accurate write

[Emily B]

subtle and eternal and full of power