The Final

This poem is precious to me. A friend of mine on my myspace wrote it on his helmet and his gun (LOL he calls it Love...showin the Bad Guys Some Love he says) and he takes it with him across the sea far away and fights evil and terrorism and its always wit

 

 

Where do I go when the shadows are too thick to think

Where can I hide if not inside of you

There's no where for me to give birth

To the screams that wish their names be held high

In to the thunder and lightening of my pain

I've held these knife wounds so long

They're thicker then anything I've ever had to survive now

The usual forget isn't covering them

And the time I've rubbed into them won't stop the bleeding

not anymore

If I close my eyes I see them

If I walk in the day light

They burn and remind me how hard I had to work

To allow myself the gift of breathing here again

But the sun reminds me always

That I do not belong

I do not know the ways of those so blessed as to not see

If they only had by eyes

blacked with my sorrow

Lost in the stars that fall and crash to earth there

In words I don't recognize anymore

I cry out my loss of sanity

None can save me here

None can protect me from the embrace that I long for

The final silent whisper of wind

That will send me to a shadow deep enough

To engulf me forever

And I'll never know my way out again

All I know is You.

You who reach through my dark slime covered thoughts

To see what light might still live here

You're so sure its salvageable

So sure it might be worth saving with ever lasting promises

But no one can save me from what my dead heart wants so badly

That final silent breath no one but I will ever hear

Final and announcing

Of an end that should have come years ago.

Author's Note

This was to my husband...so much darkness that rolls inside me like thunder...he is the one that calms the storm.