A Waiting Room

John Dies, and then some other stuff happens.

One-

 

Ominous Voice:

All is dark, soft jazz is playing in the background. The steady tap of someone’s shoe begins.  And then it ends. A small light gets turned on. There are two bottles on a table, one is a dark, and the other is light. There is also some paper on the table, and on top a pencil. John just stands there. And then he sits down.

John picks up the dark colored bottle and is about take a swig, but then he pauses.  He settles with the lightly colored bottle. He thinks that’s best. He takes a swig of that and puts it down next to him. John pulls a box of pills out of his pocket, and looks at the back as if he’s reading.

 

Debra: Will make the pain go away. Forever. Taking the whole packet is advised. (Read by wife as if she has just found the packet)

 

OV: John starts to write a note.

 

Debra: Goodbye, Debs. I never liked you that much anyway. (Also read by debs)

 

OV: John takes all the pills from the packet, and collects them into a pile in his hand. He takes once last swig from the light bottle, and then another from the dark one. John then smiles one last time and looks at his audience. They don’t smile back. John doesn’t mind though, John gets that a lot. He throws the pills down his throat. Swallows. John lies down. John dies. But not before turning the light off of course.

 

Debra:

Honey! Honey! For god sakes, turn that music down. Why are all the lights off?

 

She turns the lights on, screams, and then the lights turn off again. The ensemble comes onto the stage, and lies down in their positions. Debs is crying throughout the next conversation.

 

Ensemble:

Bing, Bing, Bing

Nine, Nine, Nine. Which service do you require?

 

Debs: The hospital

 

Ensemble: Connecting you to 07791284903

Hello, what is your emergency?

 

Debs: It’s my husband; I think he took too many pills. Please come quick, I can’t feel his pulse. I can’t feel his pulse.

 

Ensemble: Ok Madam, what is your address?

 

Debs: Um…  6 Park Lane, Guilford

 

Ensemble: Ne Nah, Ne Nah

 

The Lights are off, and a large group of people lies around the stage. A doctor is in the middle, over johns body with a defibrillator.

 

Ensemble: 3, 2, 1

 

 After one, the lights turn on, everyone on stage looks like they’re getting electrocuted, and the sound of electricity is heard. The lights go out.

 

Doctor:  Turn it up.

 

Ensemble: 3,2,1

 

The same repeats, but the sound is louder and lasts longer.

 

Doctor: Turn it up

 

Again, the same repeats.

 

Doctor: (sighs) John Smith, 43. Died at 9:37 am. Cause… Who cares, I’m going home.

Author's Note

"A waiting room" is a play that I'm writing and i would love to get anybody's feedback.

Reviews

[LuvFlyer Creations]

This was really good! Although I feel like the final line leaves the audience with an unfinished feeling. The ending feels rushed in a way. It might help if you add a little bit more drama after the doctor says, "who cares." Something that I was taught during my time in middle school was that you want to make it seem like the character tried everything rather than just give up. I do feel like the OV's perspective is a little confusing when switching back and forth. Other than that, I like the use of the ensemble to help illustrate what is going on.