Believe The Tree

Mother nature vs humanity...who will win -_-

Nature the mother of our being
Why are you so tired of believing
You were always there for us
But now we’ve found your mistrust

Our construction; your destruction
Our completion; your depletion
Our consumption brings you death
When will you breathe your last breath

I will go
You will go
This new day we’ll never know
Through this darkness we are sin
Mother nature will one day win

In the sunshine when we meet
Lying while the grass dies at our feet
Will you go or will you hide
While life drags us by its side
No matter what, we will spread
And with these hands we'll cause more dread

Maybe one day our eyes will see
How lust and greed has made you bleed
Through the ages there's been no sorrow
Now there will be no tomorrow

When will we see that we are disease
We've bought life down to its knees
All the greed that fills our eyes
Let's all watch as humanity dies

It’s time for you and me to go
To a place that no one knows
Where the wind no longer blows
Where life itself no longer grows

Through this planet we have weaved
So now it's time for us to leave

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

I do believe this requires many improvements . . .

[Twistedme]

I do believe this is mainly a song and doesnt need improvements thanks =D

[.]

I am surprised that no one else has commented on this. I concur 100% with the message of this piece. Human beings are a destructive force, that is slowly deleting where they have came from. It makes me really sad, because I feel that one can really discover themselves in nature. The only suggestion I have is that some of the rhyming was a little too choppy. Maybe if you cut down some of the extra words..it will run smoother. But that is only a suggestion, with all due reapect. Overall great topic, and great piece.

- Cord

[.]

*respect lol sorry:)

[Twistedme]

Thanks man, I was waiting/hoping for someone with a realistic view to post here. Yes humanity is the disease slowly but surely destroying this world =F Yah with this writing and my other writings from around the time i wrote them were not written following any rules of poetry, I used rhyming yes in two ways as seen but I didnt write it all to go consistantly rhyming. My writings like this were actually first written to be songs so yea were not intended to be poems haha anyway thanks for the review, much appreciated! :D