That Deep Feeling

5 minute randomness about that feeling everyone has....or wants...

You are the blood flowing through my veins
You are the comfort when it rains

You are the chill running down my spine
You are the mistress that keeps me in line

You are the blood pumping through my heart
You are the warmth that tears me apart

You are the nerve crawling down my fingers
You are the ache that always lingers

You are the blood running through my brain
You are the voice that tells me I'm sane

You are the itch crawling down my feet
You are the one that I want to meet

You are the feeling that I lack

You will cause my heart attack

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

Twisted emotions: such lovely (and deadly!) pearls, are they not? In honesty; you could improve it every now and then; such as the fourth line: warmth and falling apart, I don't see much a connection between them (oh! by the way; you misspelled 'veins' in the first line). That is but one example; I shall leave the rest to you.

[Twistedme]

When I fall apart it is the warmth of love that picks me up and keeps me going, tis what that line means. I know it's not the best poem (it only took me like 5 minutes to write) haha anyway thanks for the review man

[Tai Ryens]

To be fair; all I had to ponder on were warmth and fragments (not to mention my cold apathetic soul; if I even have one). My apologies, but I do say: far better than anything I could write in five measly minutes.

[Twistedme]

No problem man I enjoy reading peoples opinions and thoughts on what I write. I am new to writing poems anyway but I do have a mind full of crazyness so good things will come haha

[Tai Ryens]

I do find myself drawn to your writing though . . . If only I had more time to read, I would go on to other poetry pieces. No matter; I shall do it sometime in the future~

[Twistedme]

Awesome, I'm glad you like it. Il return the favor aswell and read up on your creations. Thanks again for your thoughts.