Promise

Mangoes, from a different perspective.

Promise



as candlelight, the word the evenings say,
stands guard, the softest ocean mandarin,
compare with glory of a summer's day
the promise of a gentle mango skin.
blue mountains course your rivers to their end
a tropic springtime feeds the tortoise sea
your waters, unrestrained, will not pretend;
all sluices flow your loving back to me.
your flesh, a summer soaring doves can taste
your fall still clinging to the blessed tree
your seeds, white winter sowing ends in haste
bring all the seasons and their wealth to me.
oh worldly thing, remove your cold disguise;
the mango's heartbeat lives within your eyes.

Author's Note

A Shakespearean sonnet, a statement of love.💕💕

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I read the poem before the author's note.
and one thing that always impresses me is when a poet can write a poem with a rhyme scheme and meter and the poem itself, the content stands out rather than having the rhymes slap us in the face by being too obvious...
a meaningful love poem here....William would nod and smile.
j.

[Verse]

Oh, thank you, Jacob!!! That means the world coming from a professor like you!!!

V

[emmajoy]

' ... your fall still clinging to the blessed tree - your seeds, white winter sowing ends in haste - bring all the seasons and their wealth to me... '

Wonderful, absolutely wonderful!! Am sitting here smiling, loving the emotions wrapped around your love for a mango.. and the way you've done so is brilliant. Smiling yet again, Verse! This is how a sonnet should read, smoothly and deliciously!

[Verse]

Thanks, Emma!! I do really like mangoes, you’re right!!! :):). Now I’m the one who’s smiling away.

V

[emmajoy]

Good, it's how it should be.. share a smile across the miles!

[Verse]

And if there's time
then share a rhyme.

[emmajoy]

Clever girl with many a curl!

[Robert Trakofler]

what a lovely form and flow your rhyme and rhythm were so natural in this love poem now how am I supposed to eat mangoes after reading this LOL this was a very pretty sonnet dear Verse

[Verse]

Thanks so much, Robert!!! Enjoy them, I’d say. :):)

V

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Beautifully Shakespeared, Verse.
I felt the feeling of a love, budding like a flower impacting a reader's mind.
Well written...

[Verse]

Thanks, Kay!!! A far cry from Shakespeare, but happy to oblige.

V

[Neville]

the flavours, sights and the scents you have left for us to find here are a sight for sore eyes for sure.... verily well writ..... N

[Verse]

Cheers, Nev!!! You always know exactly what to say to make me smile. 💫😇

V

[Neville]

Hey.. such a cool thing to say.. so why am I flushed..... (no toilet jokes neither)…

[Verse]

😇............

[Fairy Khan]

I only have one word for this poem, and that is 'beautiful'.

[Verse]

Thanks very much, Fairy!!! Greatly appreciated. :):)

V

[R.E. Ray]

Not much I can say after Jacob's review. I've tried to write a Shakespearean sonnet, and while it was technically correct, the content was junk. I applaud you for achieving not only form but the content. I think William S. might use fancier language, but you've nailed it for today's era. Well done.

[Verse]

Oh, don't be too hard on yourself, my friend!!! I'm no expert, either - just trying like everybody else. It's like baking - sometimes it turns out, and sometimes it doesn't look anything like what you were expecting in the first place. :):)

Thanks so much for your kind words.

V

[NotUsinganymore]

Very beautiful verses you wrote. I enjoyed them. c:

[Verse]

Why thank you, JungLee!!! Greatly appreciated!!!

V

[Pete Langley]

You`ve achieved a piece of delicious art,my dear. Having tried - and often failed - to weave a piece of properly constructed (and totally relevant) verse into sonnet form, I so much admire this piece. I`ll read more of your work with pleasure. Sperb. P.

[Verse]

Thank you so much, Pete - I have to admit, I took a sonnet-writing course awhile back, but before that didn't have a clue.:):)

I look forward to reading your work as well!!!

V

[Einstein Noodle]

awwwwww what a romantic Mango ... i want one now!! ;))))))))))))))))))))))))))) well done .. i'm not the one to check iambs nor form for inconsistencies .. as Jacob points out .. it is not easy to use this classic structure and hang our common language on it ... but you have .. and using it lifts the status of the lowly mango to unforeseen heights says i ...now i am day dreaming of rivers of juices .. savory tastes as all the seasons do bring us much bounty in the fruit ... well done! luscious actually :)
E.

[Verse]

Thank you so much, Einstein!!! Glad to oblige!!!

Very kind of you to present me with such richness in a review!!! 😀😀

V

[Chris Shaw]

Sonnets are difficult in my opinion to compose. This is an accomplished write Verse, much appreciated. Yes I agree with Jacob, impressive. Great to read.

Chris

[Verse]

Thanks so much, Christine!!! I just love sonnets... in some alternate universe, we’d all be down at the greengrocer, speaking in iambic pentameter.

Thanks for the beautiful review!!! Smiling away at this end.

V

[Chris Shaw]

I love a good sonnet too. You don't see many of them around nowadays :(

Chris