Prologue

I guess this is the prologue in a sense, just describing the death of Caroline's mother.

Caroline closed her eyes. Not because she planned for something better when she did, no, it wasn’t an escape. It was a blink. Or, at least, it started out as one. A blink that hurt so bad she didn’t dare open her eyes again. To open her eyes would mean feeling it all again. The pain, the fear. And darkness is oh so definitely better than that.

    This woman couldn’t be Caroline’s mother. This woman, laying here, had flat hair framing a pale face with slightly sunken in cheeks. The woman that Caroline knew so well had hair that bounced on her shoulders and a face that glowed with kindness. Caroline felt the slightest shift at the corners of her lips at the memory.   

“To start off,” the pastor began, “Would anyone like to say some words about Maria?” He asked, his voice heavy with faked grief.

    No one moved, no one spoke. It was as though they were all afraid the moment would shatter if they continued too quickly. But maybe, the silence was worst of all. So, without much of a thought, Caroline stood up.

    She stood up and walked swiftly to the front of the church, her black dress tickling against her knees. But she didn’t really feel it, no, she felt none of it. Everyone watched quietly as a heartbroken little girl walked down the aisle. Here she was. People were finally going to listen to what she had to say. Yet it seemed that no words quite fit. The air craved something that she just didn’t have within her to say. This moment, this second, it all felt so wrong.

    All these people sat here, grieving that someone actually escaped this wretched world. It was wretched because no one had the heart to change it. Her mother died never really DOING anything. So why were they all just sitting there, not willing to do anything awesome with their lives? Maybe it wasn’t what the air wanted to hear, but it was exactly what Caroline wanted to- needed to say.

    “Screw this.” And she walked right back down the aisle and straight to the door, nobody willing to go after her.

    As she walked out those church doors and into the sunlight, Caroline Rose broke.

Author's Note

Am I rambling?