A Poem by Toribird

So i wrote this at 11:11 and it kinda fits my dreaming/wishing self.

Its important to every girl who believes that if she wishes hard enough her wish will come true.
For the girls who fall asleep with their wish on their mind playing ways to make it come true. 
11:11 is a wishing time.
Its a moment of hope that the true love we long for, dream for, and wish for, will appear. 
Who knows.
maybe someone hears the wishes. 
maybe its a lie. 
but it gives me hope that the day will be brighter tomorrow.
11:11 is my minute to wish.
To cry.
To dream.
To hope.
What may seem another moment in the day is a moment where my heart comes clean.
In that minute my soul flies and my heart and head are clear. 
For that minute i close my eyes.
The world is gone.
Its just my wish.
11:12.....its gone by....
I have to wait another night for that moment of breathless delight....

© 2010 Toribird

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Oh, Love! this is perfect! I love how you can make both of our favorite minutes in the day be so open and hopeful. You did a fantastic job!

Posted 14 Years Ago

Nice poem about that superstition. Good expression of beliefs that many people hold and the way humanity clings to these wishes. People are always so skeptical of them and continuously think that they aren't real and they are a lie but they desperately hold onto the idea that they just might come true and that these superstitions exist to bring our innermost dreams to life. You could use work with the structure and the flow, adding some breaks in there. Also, you have grammatical errors, you need to capitalize those "i"'s and add apostrophes into the "its" to signify a contraction of "it is". But otherwise, it's a nice poem. Well done.

Posted 14 Years Ago

I like the way you use the beliefs in this poem. I think you could use some breaks, but that is only to make the reading of it a little easier and to help match the stanza after "11:11 is my minute to wish." Overall, I enjoyed this write, it captured the beliefs we hold, even in the face of a lack of evidence. Very well done.

Posted 14 Years Ago

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3 Reviews
Added on April 25, 2010
Last Updated on April 26, 2010
Tags: 11:11, Kirabird, Kira, Bird, wish, dream, wishing, dreaming, thinking, hoping, girls, heart, minute, eleven



Conifer, CO

Well. Hi. =) You can all me Kira or bird. Kirabird is the name one of my very close friends give me. Its a mix between a nickname and my real name. You will never guess which is which. =) I am a dance.. more..

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