To be alive

To be alive

A Poem by S.zaynab.kamoonpury
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Click on top side pic for zoom in close up to read quotes as well

"
To be alive isn't just to be alive and kicking
feeling your own legs and limbs.
To be alive is to
percieve the sights and sounds
that those who have kicked the bucket can't appreciate
until resurrection and the long wait for heaven's gate

God's most precious gift to us
Is life which He breathed into our souls.

But to be alive is to thaw
the frozen cold heart
with the warmth of feeling
coz we aren't born coldblooded.

Alive is
the sense of hearing
that hearkens not just the artificial violin
but the natural songbird's birdsong.
To see not just the obvious, the apparent
but as well to see with the eyes of wisdom.
To not just gaze at silver screens and the telly all day
But rather to gaze and observe all of nature's scenery and sights around you,
Let us not be the living dead....

To feel not just your own skin,
to not spend life touching cellphones
but rather employ the sense of touch
to feel petals and other critters.
To be alive isn't to smell your own breath and sweat
but to inhale all the distinct fragrances of nature.
And to taste not merely of the artificial flavors
of fizzy pale poison refined sugar's sodas
but to cup your hands to taste the raindrop!

Do I in anyway imply by this that those born blind, deaf or dumb are less alive?
Never! For I've seen the blind appreciate divinely created nature far more than the seeing.
For to the blind every sound is precious,
for every voice they are grateful.
And every touch has meaning...
For a missing and lacking sense or organ is compensated by the activation of the other senses or organs.
I had a domestic helper who was deaf
yet so smart and more eagle-eyed, keen and alert about happenings around her

Be alive with all your God given senses
Don't wait to be deprived of even one,
to appreciate them.
For senses like limbs, freeze and can get impaired
when they're not in usage.
God created this world for our toil and to appreciate life as a divine present,
We must thank Him for granting us existence
so we deserve the next life in heaven.

The spirit of poetry guides my inking I feel
it tells me what to jot down from m my myriad thoughts

© 2019 S.zaynab.kamoonpury


Author's Note

S.zaynab.kamoonpury
Do click on side top pic to zoom in to close up to read inspiring quotes

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Featured Review

I like the quotes. Saw you on the home-page. Well liked this so much.😀 Simply I'd say it's like finding hope in darkness... Umm alliteration in an unrhymed poem (just example) This is a different one from alliteration... Great Write hope you'd like to see my page as well.😉
Good Luck!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Aurora

1 Year Ago

There's someone else here to be the reason. Focus on you critique... :) you'll do great.
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Sorry I don't get u. What reason and what someone else? Warmest thanxx for your fine comment on my p.. read more
Aurora

1 Year Ago

nevermind. :) You're doing really well.



Reviews

What an extraordinary piece! In a way, it felt like a church sermon. And I mean that in a good way. So many great, yet gentle reminders her of what is really important in life and what isn't. I found this piece to be like a guiding hand rather than preachy parent. One that you'd listen to the message and welcome it.
I enjoyed this very much. Thank you for sharing such wondrous words!
Blessings
Amber

Posted 1 Month Ago


This poem is like a collection of gifts bestowed on humanity. You've reminded us to be thankful for our lives and to consider ourselves fortunate to be here. It is inspiring.

Posted 6 Months Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

6 Months Ago

Thanks soo much for your great lofty way you summed this prose up. Best wishes,

despite everything tis a joy to be sure.... life that is....

Leonard Norman Cohen once asked "is a rat more alive than a turtle"

Poem enjoyed my friend..

Neville

Posted 11 Months Ago


As for your artwork (sayings) -- I also believe that the universe is constantly sending us signals & part of the job of becoming aware is to be able to pick up on these signals thru-out life. I love how your message is half down-to-earth straightforward persuasion & the other half is done thru imagery, showing us what this might feel like & you use vivid, original-sounding examples of how it feels to be alive, & also NOT alive. "Smell your own breath & sweat" is a great analogy for how some people are so self-absorbed, they do not see the bigger picture or the balance . . . just seeing our own ugly response to the junk that assaults us & makes us stink & fume. There are many such vivid ways you have of showing & evoking a ton of feelings behind each image (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Year Ago


I like the quotes. Saw you on the home-page. Well liked this so much.😀 Simply I'd say it's like finding hope in darkness... Umm alliteration in an unrhymed poem (just example) This is a different one from alliteration... Great Write hope you'd like to see my page as well.😉
Good Luck!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Aurora

1 Year Ago

There's someone else here to be the reason. Focus on you critique... :) you'll do great.
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Sorry I don't get u. What reason and what someone else? Warmest thanxx for your fine comment on my p.. read more
Aurora

1 Year Ago

nevermind. :) You're doing really well.
Hey zaynab!
Reading this very enlightening piece, I felt like I was listening to someone trying their hand painstakingly at a long, laborious, philosophical kind of speech to a trapped, exasperated audience with darting eyes, impatiently tapping feet, looking longingly at the exit. How about more show than tell? How about better examples than "I had a domestic helper who was deaf" - Boy. That sounded condescending. And a bit insensitive..? ."those who have kicked the bucket can appreciate..."
One saving grace...your English is good unlike some utterly hopeless cases I have seen here. You just need to be more imaginative and to the point. Overall I agree with your message. So good luck with your future pieces.

Posted 1 Year Ago


AJNJ

1 Year Ago

Just to prove how fake the duffer below is- she’s here because I critiqued you and she wants to ga.. read more
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Why do u mock both her and my writings? Mockery is not right.
AJNJ

1 Year Ago

Sorry. Not intentional 😞 I’ll go. No one likes Pestonjee’s feedback. Take care.
certainly a worthwhile message in here Zaynab:) Much is lost when so many concern there efforts to an electronic handheld device and not peek out from under the screen to what is right in front of them:(

Posted 1 Year Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Yay yeahh indeed, I like how you put it poet Bunny, you make us realize how we could miss out on so .. read more
I really like your opening verse, and the concept that it is our perceptions, our senses that those who have kicked the bucket will miss being able to appreciate in life, rather than physicality. Your writing is very philosophical and flows from symbolism to words of advice - there is a fine line here though, sometimes words of advice can appear too pushy and although I think you dance back and forth over this fine line, you don't take it too far. This is the first I have read from you and I enjoyed it! Looking forward to reading more.
Laura.

Posted 1 Year Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Yeah I plan to edit so ithe poem doesn't sound too pushy; my poem's a reminder to me as well. I feel.. read more
LouBelle

1 Year Ago

Absolutely, I understand how you feel! And it is a lovely message you are conveying. :)
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

I'm glad you are of those who understand.🌷 take care.
Truisms and stoicisms... valid and to be valued thoughts. But be wary of "telling" it often comes across as talking down to another than talking with an other.

Posted 1 Year Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

I get you sir, maybe I should change ' yous ' more to we, coz I certainly need to remind myself of t.. read more
Chris

1 Year Ago

"We's" might work better - would have to listen to the new tones of your words. And yet having a wo.. read more
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I am not really a fan of these sorts of philosophy-lite styles of writing. Quite often all that is written is basic common sense and oft repeated words and themes.

Your message here is strong; to engage with life with all our senses before we lose them and succumb to our end. It's true that when one loses a sense the others compensate for its loss and become sharper than the norm. So we should always embrace life and all it has to offer.

Some of your language reads a little blunt; "those who have kicked the bucket can appreciate...", it could use a little more finesse and as a whole the piece should resist straying too far from your initial idea. A write becomes a laborious read when one goes off on different tangents of thought. Just something to consider for next time.

Overall, a nice moral contained within.

Posted 1 Year Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Hmm I always thought philosophy and common sense are very different and paradoxical together so I'm.. read more
.

1 Year Ago

The term i used was, "philosophy-lite", meaning written in that style of thought but without the dee.. read more
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

1 Year Ago

Oh ok will check that out, that's a new word for me. And I feel what I wrote is not common sense sin.. read more

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Added on December 7, 2019
Last Updated on December 12, 2019

Author

S.zaynab.kamoonpury
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

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I like to call myself a poetess even though I'm no professional or conventional at writing poetry. Have been writing poems for some time and readers say they get message and/or entertainment from the.. more..

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