If only I'd known

A Story by alex.rollet

The heat radiating down the flawless sky bathes my skin in an aura of heat. A butterfly comes flying past my ear and into the horizon. As I watch it flutter away, the symmetrical circular pattern on its wings appears to be looking down on me, as if it were mocking me for being stuck down on earth. I close my eyes. The fresh breeze of the early morning rushes on my face as it fills my nose with a familiar scent of damp grass. Leaning back onto my window sill, I dip the tip of my lip into my glass of iced water; appreciating the contrast with the burning heat. I back away from the window, further into a dark world closed off of nature. I inhale the last tonic breath of summer and exhale a crisp puff of autumn. I open my eyes. Summer has gone. I dazedly fall back onto my desk chair and open my laptop. Scrolling through various documents on my desktop, I must’ve clicked the wrong file as my heart gets taken back by the sudden emergence of your face in the corner of my screen. To my surprise, having seen it so many times before, it now looks different. While your cheeky smile reflects your booming confidence, your eyes, however, filled with love and kindness, let me pierce right through your armor. I get lost in them, drowning in this much too familiar and painful feeling. My vision becomes a blur as progressively as my memories do. I feel a pinch in the centre of my chest as I persist in recalling your words and promises. The harsh reality hits me as the screen in front of me turns to dark. My body aches in fear of losing sight of you. Now, and now only, can I say, if only I’d known.