Contradicting ComfortA Poem by Amber Dawn AginI find comfort in odd places.I find comfort in odd places; I enjoy the breakdowns screaming into silence heart shattering to the floor sobbing deep and slow as I rip myself to pieces The blood drips from each cut down my arm flowing like a river It’s mesmerizing to watch blood oozing unevenly from the tears of my flesh I love the chaotic lines of anger jagged, curved, furious skin broken by pure rage I love the solid lines of hurt smooth, clear, concise skin cut in waves of sadness I find comfort in contradicting places; I enjoy the aftermath silent rooms with ticking clocks medical supplies scattering the floor sunrise through broken windows seemingly saying tomorrow has come The blood is rinsed off each cut down the drain of my sink there’s an ocean of pink dyed pain It’s mesmerizing to watch water wash away every past sin I love washing my wounds rinse, add peroxide, dry stepping into a soothing rhythm I love wrapping my wounds gauze, bandage, tape carefully caring for each cut I simultaneously love tearing myself apart and putting the pieces back together I make my body a ritual of broken shards constantly fit together like a puzzle only to be shattered time and time again There’s twisted comfort in destruction I've found there's comfort in restoration too they coexist; one must be broken to be repaired one must be repaired to be broken again I seek comfort in such never ending cycles and wonder how it's never found for long © 2016 Amber Dawn AginAuthor's Note
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Added on September 12, 2016 Last Updated on September 12, 2016 Tags: self harm, mental illness, depression, cutting AuthorAmber Dawn AginHarrisburg, ILAboutJust your typical 19 year old girl that's kinda messed up in the head and thinks she can be poetic *shrugs* more..Writing
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