unrelated prose

unrelated prose

A Story by anamezic

In Santa Barbara, summer doesn't come on the first of June. Instead, it shatters across the seasons, tiny filaments glinting even in the darkest months, and casts a facade from their prisms.  People are hungry for it. In June, tourists spew out of taxies, cruise ships, trains and planes like a tidal wave of vomit. Couples hold each other and their shopping bags  pretending for the day that they too are part of this coy escape from the rest of the country. Surely someplace so akin to heaven is exempt from the corruption of consumerism and politics. People come here to forget. I've seen them, with their laughter. Families strolling down State Street dressed up, sun drunk, flushed cheeks pushed back by their smiles. I always thought it strange how all animals bare their teeth at each other for one reason or another.

A planet with the potential to host life was discovered in the constellation Lyra, which I think is quaint and somewhat poetic, but the potentials won't know it, and when we tell them, they wont care and, most likely, laugh, however they do. Kepler-62e circles its star in 122.4 earth days. It can take much less than that to die from cancer and much more to realize someone stopped loving you long ago. In Greek Mythology, Orpheus, a musician poet prophet, was killed at the hands of those who could not hear his music. His head and lyre, still playing, floated down the to the Mediterranean shore where winds and waves brought them to the Lesbos islands before his lyre was carried to the skies by muses to spend eternity (or, the road to complete entropy) as a constellation. Sometimes I wish American politics was being strangled by mythology rather than monotheism. At least the Greeks didn't pretend any god made in the image of man was exempt from his flaws. 

© 2013 anamezic

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I support a more neutral author POV - with opinions being expressed by the characters. Maybe your story would gain something if you tried that way:)

Posted 8 Years Ago

Well, living just an hour north of Santa Barbara, I felt this one, especially the first lines. Our seasons are so interesting here; today, for example, the sun came out for about two hours, and yet it is still lovely.

A powerful write in many ways...very perceptive and poignant. I like the observations that you make, they are very thought provoking. Being a fan of Greek mythology, I could definitely feel your last line. Well written.

Posted 9 Years Ago

Pieces for comparison. Both about flaws in human, or gods, nature. Both about behaviour and both as different from each other as they can be. I am interested as to why you hav combined these pieces. I would say that perhaps hedonism plays a part in both. As does freedom of behviour. suffice it to say both are, strong and well written. They both add to understanding and above all they made me think about what I was writing here in reply.

Posted 9 Years Ago

Separately two very interesting pieces.
The first being to me more of a descriptive nature and of much mental imagery. This piece was very interesting in it's beginning of beauty then to me a slow decent into disdain. at this point though the ending didn't really make sense to me.

The second piece is very ideological and carries much food for thought. Some of it to me seemed a bit distant in concept but otherwise a great write, the impact on this ending felt a lot more appropriate to me. Of course these are only my thoughts and opinions so use what you can and discard the rest.
1. 95/100
2. 100/100
overall 100/100

Posted 9 Years Ago

You had a lot of great pieces of prose in both sections. But the one that stood out to me the most was, "At least the Greeks didn't pretend any god made in the image of man was exempt from his flaws." I love Greek mythology. This statement is so powerful, and so very true!

Posted 9 Years Ago

Ooo, I'm very interested in the first part. Will you be doing more with it? Great job, on both pieces :)

Posted 9 Years Ago

Very cool piece of mind exercise in both cases. Nice.

Posted 9 Years Ago

Two very interesting and thought provoking pieces. Well written and engaging and both very different.

Posted 9 Years Ago

A beautiful, evocative piece, one that really showcases your flair for metaphor. Brilliant work!

Posted 9 Years Ago

Both the points made are interesting, I especially like the second. One of my favorite things about Greek mythology is that their gods reflected people. Christianity imposes godliness on people, but God is a terrible character that performs all kinds of impulsive actions. The emulation of that behavior and feeling that it's justified is all kinds of dangerous.

There's an American political connection between these two, but finding the depth of the connection is up to the reader. They split the idea of Heaven, too; the first implies sanctuary, while the second is control.

Lots to think about in these lines. Good work.

Posted 9 Years Ago

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11 Reviews
Added on May 20, 2013
Last Updated on May 20, 2013




19 year old from California moving to Brookyln for an education. work inspired by digitization/ philosophy/ degenerate mental health and unfaltering romanticism more..


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