Now you've seen

Now you've seen

A Book by Julie Fran
"

You weren't supposed to look; not to know. But now you do, now you've looked. Now he's to search for what are the lie's and what is the truth.

"

Chapters


© 2015 Julie Fran


Author's Note

  Julie Fran
I'm going to finish this if it's the last thing I do.

My Review

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Reviews

I feel what you mean about being determined to finish a novel!

Just wanted to check, because the tagline intrigued me and sounds awesome - but checking wording:

'Now he's to search whats lies and the truth.' - do you mean 'what are lies and the truth'? Because 'what's' is the contracted form of 'what is'. Either way, it needs an apostrophe in the contacted version.

Also,

'For he's seen what they've seen and their's no greater truth than that. Right' - I don't think 'he's seen' makes sense, as it's the contracted form of 'he is'. If you phrased it, 'For he has seen...' it would make a lot more sense. This goes again for the three contractions in your sentence - it makes it a little confusing. I'd recommend breaking up the sentence, or avoid using so many contractions.

This is how I would re-structure the sentence. Up to you, if you want to change it! I'm just a stickler for detail (inner English teacher and that):
- 'For he has seen what they too have seen, and there is no greater truth than that. Right?'

Anyway - it sounds really interesting, which is why I'm leaving a way-too-detailed comment! Can't wait to the chapters :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


  Julie Fran

8 Years Ago

Hahaha, I Noticed that last night!! I was so tired I just was like ehhh. Thanks for reading and I wi.. read more

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Added on September 15, 2015
Last Updated on September 15, 2015
Tags: game, boy, duo, rebel, fight, bully, future, genius, smart, smoker, virtual, crime, murder, mystery.

Author

  Julie Fran
Julie Fran

About
Welcome, I'm 18 years old. A senior this year and my goal is to continue to improve my writing skills. more..

Writing