Sometimes

Ups and Downs. The rollercoaster of life

Sometimes I am sad. Sometimes I am euphoric. Sometimes I want to scream at the top of my lungs. Other times I want to write it all down. Sometimes I cannot find the right words like I am trapped inside my own mind and all I can muster is a mere word when people ask how I am. There’s this weight in my mind, constantly reminding me of its presence. It’s determination to distract me and remind me of the power it has. Though at times, I feel stronger. I have the power. Except when I don’t. I am suffocating under a blanket of emotion I can rarely express. I call it anxiety because that’s the socially accepted term. But it’s more. It’s deeper. My smile seems fake. A single laugh hurts more than it helps at times. Am I faking it? Is it just a common practice that pushes people away? The simplicity of it keeps me safe, stops them from wondering “is she ok?”. Halts the fear and uncrossed path of depression from entering our minds. Those are not thoughts we like to entertain. I’m fine. She’s fine. We will all be okay.

Sometimes I am sad. Sometimes I am happy. Sometimes I have the motivation to do new things and work hard for my passions and future. Other times I want to drink it away and forget everything. I have thoughts of my future. But then I can’t seem to imagine what that might be life. A future. A life where things are different. One day. One day I’ll be happy, one day I’ll feel better. When is one day?

Reviews

[Paul Bell]

Think you're right, life is a rollercoaster, but what a rollercoaster of opportunity when the wheels are turning. Somedays you'll come up against brick walls, but that's just a hurdle to maneuver.
Most of the fear in our lives never happen, so, motivation is the byword for fun and adventure.