Rebirth

The story of how I became saved.

Life keeps giving lessons, still scared of my reflection
have self doubt but yet I'm still in pursuit of perfection
pain of future rejection, youth of fatherly neglection
no friends to relate to, feelings I never mention

not to mention, our happiness is equated to a pension
picking the right career is birthing apprehension
money rules the world, but its slowly ruining mine
cause I have more now, but I feel I've lost time

everyone around you succumbing to the vanity
trying to be righteous at my age, becoming my insanity
 then the anger that I'm in love with a stranger
 who I never see and she doesn't have the decency

to even call me and tell me how she really feels
so now I'm guessing that's telling, how she really feels  
but your confused like you found your soul mate
but she's fronting like she's with her soul mate

you were ready to pack up, to try to be with someone else's girl
then your conscious started screaming "you'd be ruining someone else's world"
and he probably sees in her almost everything that you see
and it gets you pissed off start asking yourself "why me"?

Let him have his, even if it's a lie she lives
I'm at fault for trying to take what G-d didn't give
So now its back to the broads that are non-relatable
still trying to get you jealous, every time I go on a date or two

then ignore you, thinking "your just a w***e too"
just couldn't get past the fact that I'd do anything for you
 lets get drugs involved, maybe that will get things solved
innocent first puff.... wasn't innocent enough

 smoke got you blinded, now it's rappers you want to mimic
your waking up feeling timid, at a depression clinic
sleeping your whole life away, going out night to day
even more pessimistic; now you don't even pray

your around new people, so the anxiety must go
your drinking so much, until it's yourself you don't know
now here comes the blackouts, nights you couldn't react out
 your losing control, but now its nothing you react about

doing things now, in your right mind, you'd snub
different women in Miami hotels, blowing stacks at strip clubs .
it's rough, but your acting like you never been happier
inside your hurting so bad, even worse you feel sad

want to change your attitude, but now you feel cursed
cause these pills they gave you only makes you feel worst
suddenly I felt his presence, put my faith foot back on the peddle
because it wasn't G-d I felt, I'm talking about the Devil

now I'm off every drug, only G-d and myself to rely on
the present is now the focus, the past is now a bygone.