King of Hearts

I try to put myself to sleep with bay leaf incense in the hell of silence

the closest thing to heaven for me is that scent

I write poems from my old pains so this can't break my current heart

I'm angry with myself because I wasn't someone who would be upset about these things.

But I can't help.

My right side, which represents the male side of the body, is starting to hurt

and damn it, no. I don't want to see another sign

of you there, not here with me.

I'm picking up my cards and begging them to prove me wrong

I try to listen to my inner voice while shuffling the cards, 

but I can't hear it because of the silence.

and a card falls

as i turn it over my right hand gets lighter

King of Hearts

I'm glad I was wrong

and I beg to the full moon to gift me forgiveness again

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I do like a desk of cards. (Red Sovine - Vietnam Deck Of Cards). I use to play a lot in my Army days.
"and a card falls
as i turn it over my right hand gets lighter
King of Hearts
I'm glad I was wrong
and I beg to the full moon to gift me forgiveness again"
Good to ask the moon and a quiet night. We can find forgiveness. Thank you dear Beren for sharing the amazing poetry and your thoughts.
Coyote

[Beren]

Aw that's a good one. Thank you so much for taking time to read and comment sir.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Love this
It’s so clever using a deck of cards I write one a while ago too
Or was it chess I’ll have to check lol
My mind lol
Well done

[Beren]

Hahaha thank you! I will check your poem too! Let me know what was it!

[red93]

Fabulous B - this is a real development in yr Writing - I can feel yr confidence as a Poet growing. Really Excellent ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Beren]

Aww. What a nice thing to say! Thank you so much sir! You made my day!

[red93]

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Bay leaf incense? I've always preferred sandalwood or Nag Champa myself, those earthy, musky smells. But I do put bay leaf in my green beans when I make them. I like the way you wove this together. Nicely done.

[Beren]

You can try burning bay leaves once! and it definitely great with food! I love sandalwood too!
Thank you so much for taking time to read and comment sir!

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I will do it once just to try the smell. But if the cops come over and ask what the funny aroma is I'm telling them it's your fault. (laughing) Just kidding. Off to burn a bay leaf.

[Beren]

Haha! I take the blame! But when the cops come, the smell will have spread to calm the surroundings.So don't worry about it! Let me know If you like it!

[Lorry]

Isn't it strange the amount of scents we use to bring a bit of calm and sleep to our over-active lives?
I use Radox bath soaks, which come in about a hundred different scents these days, depending on whether you want to calm, energise or soak those muscles.
I just read the label and my favourite is Shea butter and ginger, which is my herbal equivalent of a sleeping tablet.
I must look to see if Bay leaves is an ingredient in one of them.
Another handy tip would be to get older, which I suppose we are all doing but nowadays I find the old pains hurt less amongst all the new pains, like arthritis. Sometimes when I feel my ankle bones is made of broken glass of a night, I quite forget all of my past pains and pray to a God I don't believe in to let me sleep in peace, even for a little while.

[Beren]

I absolutely loved this comment and I have never felt so understood. You made a comment like a poem that I could definitely agree with every word. Yes, how strange it is that people take refuge in nature, smells, and gods they don't believe in just to escape from the busy and stressful world they have created!
and bay leaf is always very special! It is believed that its aura is very high and brings abundance. Although I am normally overwhelmed by such smells, I find bay leaf lighter and more relaxing
Thank you so much for taking time to read and comment! Much appreciated!

[redzone]

interesting notion, "I write poems from my old pains so this can't break my current heart". I wonder, is that possible to separate out old pains? I suppose this is true if we can learn from those old pains and not repeat whatever it was that caused them. Oft times though, that "King of Hearts" and full moon, leads us to "new old pain".
-Curt

[Beren]

I think I have somehow managed to categorize my pains and not let them interfere with each other. And I am proud of my ability to balance this. But please, let's be more hopeful! Life never brings only good or bad. The truth is life brings nothing, we take it from our own perspective. And I will believe that this new moon and the King of the Hearts will bring me something good. Even if the outcome is bad, it will have taught me a lesson, isn't that a good thing?
Thank you so much for your comment sir!