Voicemail

With each ring my discomfort grows,

why aren't you picking up?

what have I done to make you so silent?

With each ring my mind wanders farther,

how could I do something so wrong and not understand what it is?

will you ever forgive me?

With each ring my hand shakes harder,

my knees grow weaker,

and my vision darker.

With each ring we drift,

until i hear that click, and your familiar voice.

we cry, we say we understand, and we repeat.

With each ring we run the circle once more.

Reviews

[MVM]

I enjoyed every single line of your poem!
beautifully written.
I really like the way you repeated "with each ring", it gave the poem a little spark, if you know what I mean. good job!

[Keegan]

Your poetry is very authentic
Your profile says that you write as an outlet for all your thoughts and emotions that get bottled up, and I think that holds true for you. I feel like I've climbed inside your head and experienced something with you.

From what I've seen thus far, there is always truth in your words, and it's very relatable. Cleanly written. Nice work :)

[Allen Smuckler]

Heartfelt with wonderful tone and texture... The imagery of each ring was felt and embraced. Thanks for sharing this beautiful write...

[Heather]

Yassss, amazing!

Short but sweet and to the point

Keep going!

[The earth (Titan maphah..]

I like this really... keep on writing

[Joey Nizz]

I can really feel the characters discomfort in this message.
Well done, this is a good write.