The Black Dog

My black dog is tamed but always near by my side.

The black dog is waiting,
Waiting outside my door
To lead me down dark
Corridors of my mind
Past stations in the wall;
Rope, razor, pill and gun.

Black velvet shrouds drape
Pressing walls, enclosing; lulling
Me like a Nick Drake song.
Glass obsidian floors cover 
Unfathomable twisting rivers of 
Dark thoughts, glimmering through
The faint defenses I have cobbled.

He takes me down un-cheerful.
Leaden purpose darks out the
Light. Pulls the covers over, 
Willing me to sleep and dream 
Foreboding ways to end the pain.
To stop at stations in the wall and
Choose respite from it all.

I used to fear the visits; tried
Everything to bar the door.
All the frenzy, all the fear,
Empowered him to enter and
Lead me down dark corridors,
Past stations in the wall,
Rope, razor, pill and gun.

Alas, I no longer fear him.
He cannot tie the knot or
Slice the vein, drug me to oblivion,
Put gun to head, without my hand.
He will get bored and disappear. 
Knowing this and not to fear the 
Bite, has tamed his power over me.

He will be waiting, always waiting
For me to let him in and like an old
Familiar friend, he will walk me
Down dark corridors again, still
Stopping at the stations, knowing
I no longer  consider these choices as
Salvation. He will leave me to the light.

Reviews

[Neville]

What a familiar journey you have just taken me on Jack, quite literally a literary de ja vu & just or the record, I've been there too. You cracked it with this one, well done.

All Good Things, Neville

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you very much Neville and I feel that I must apologize to you for not responding quicker but the bloody thing is visiting at the moment and It's such an effort just to log on to my computer this week...I promise I will visit when the gloom has lifted.

[Neville]

You just take care my friend, Neville

[Pete Langley]

You call the Dog your familiar friend - and as our alter ego that`s exactly what he is. Like any unwelcome companion, we only recognise and tolerate their presence if they don`t invade our space. You recognise your Dog and lock him up very well in your piece. Well done P.

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you Peter. The familiar friend sort of comes out of the concept, what you resist persists. If you accept your black dog and allow it to enter,it will leave sooner.

[J. J. Nightingale]

Not knowing who "He' is(Dog) ?.. or who Nick Drake is .. .. or what "stations" are .. But this seems like "depression" speaking ... Been there ... this is an apt description ..



Jazzy :)

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you for the review. The Black Dog was the name Winston Churchill gave to his depression and Nick Drake was an English singer/songwriter that suffered from depression and died from an overdose of anti-depressents when he was 26. No one knows if it was deliberate or an accident.
As for the stations, I tried to reference them to the staions of the cross in a Catholic church. The staions in this case are icons to suicide.

[J. J. Nightingale]

Oh ..ok thanks .. J. :)

[Verser]

I like this effort. It captures so poignantly the mood, the depression, and its omnipresent character. Never goes away, lurking always. This is nicely done--and I love the imagery and references in the poem. I'd like to see more of your poems!

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you very much and your welcome to read any or all if you like.

[Renée]

Oh the HaLL..great write though about over coming the fear & weakness..finding strength to walk that dreaded hall and out the door !

[Gray Witch]

Amazing prose so forceful and yet disturbing until the last stanza. I always try to read the first posted writes on this site. I think they say a lot about the author. I'm also gald you posted the explanation as I sometimes get lost in the words.......

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you for the review and the kind comments. I'm still trying to feel my way around this site, I'll pop by for a visit soon.

[Jack Dawkins]

Thank you for the review. The Black Dog was the name Winston Churchill gave to his depression and Nick Drake was an English singer/songwriter that suffered from depression and died from an overdose of anti-depressents when he was 26. No one knows if it was deliberate or an accident.

[Lonesome Traveler]

I love they images that are conjured up purely by the phrase 'black dog, it just seems to be the perfect way to encapsulate the spirit of death calling and pulling, like it's own forcefield. A hopeful and positive ending to what, after the depth of the first stanza, felt like the final walk.