Chapter One - The Accident

Chapter 1

It was so dark outside. I couldn't see a thing.

My phone had rang just as I was about to fall asleep. As I suddenly felt my eyes pulling back into myself and my body begin to go limp, the hum of my cell phone interrupted my peace. I had set it to silent so I could finally get a proper night’s sleep but, either way, the phone rang. I sat up, both mystified and aggravated, before pulling my cell from the charger without releasing the cord. A random number appeared on the screen.

I answered the phone hesitantly. "Hello?" I said with a groggy whisper. I pressed the phone between my shoulder and my cheek, blinking sleepily in and out of consciousness. My throat locked up and I suddenly began to feel warm tears flooding down my cheeks.

I sat up straight. "What are you saying exactly?" I pushed but  didn't let the voice on the other end finish. "Tell me the truth." I commanded and slid out of my bed.

"You're lying to me. Stop it!" I commanded. "Where is he?"

I put the phone on speaker and put it on my nightside table so that I could gather some of my necessary things. My head was foggy from sleepiness but I could barely process my own emotions. Instead, I was focused on getting ready.

"I'll be there in 5 minutes." I said and inhaled sharply.

I had never driven in Manhattan before. It wasn't at all like where I was from, even at night there was traffic. The people who walked the streets looked comical; some of them would wobble out of clubs looking like streetwalkers before sliding into a car. Then again, they could actually be street walkers.

I was taking in short breaths, too short. My vision was hazy and I felt so ghastly light headed. It was like one of those moments when somebody you loved told you exactly what you didn't want to hear - you didn't feel anything. Instead, you could feel the pressure on your chest as you would bow out of the room.

I felt the outside water slowly begin to drip first on my head, second on my shoulders and then suddenly it began to pour. The water soaked me from the top of my body until I could feel my feet splashing in puddles as I lightly pressed the brake pedal to turn into the parking lot.

I couldn't tell if I was crying at that point and I quickly pulled the keys out of the ignition. I was beyond exhausted but nervous. My heart stood on edge as I covered my head with my purse and ran through the automatic doors that led into the waiting room.

The lights were fluorescent making the white and slightly dirty walls look blue. My chest ached and suddenly I began to cry in painful suffocating sobs. The hair on my arms stood up straight and my back tightened as I ran my hands down the wall and over towards the counter where a short stubby woman's back faced me. I wiped one of my eyes.

"Excuse me?" I said in-between sobs.

The woman didn't respond and she continued talking on her outdated land-line. I felt helpless and muted.

"Excuse me? I'm here to see my husband." I lied with vigor.

The woman took a deep sigh and turned around; putting her outdated phone face down on the counter. She pulled a clipboard out from behind her desk and handed it to me. "Fill this out with your husband's information and then give it back to me."

I agreed and filled out the form much too quickly, the consequence of lying.

"Where is he? Can I see him?" I could feel a chill run down my spine. Why was I soaking wet? Oh my God, I drove my rented convertible open through a thunderstorm.

The bitter woman revealed her stocky frame as she walked around her desk.

"Please follow me." She commanded. I nodded complacently before the receptionist/nurse looked into my eyes. I suddenly felt very self conscious of my wet pajamas. "Do I know you from somewhere?" She pressed and I looked down the long hallway she was guiding me through.

"No." I said boldly and she sighed apologetically.

Then she led me to a dark, plain room.

My shepard turned to look into the patient’s room, leaving me standing just feet away from him, paralyzed. I couldn’t look in. I couldn’t dare. For a moment, I was utterly alone again but, before I even had time to wallow in my sadness, I heard the woman’s voice erupt. “Kathleen!” The stubby nurse cried energetically. From there, there was more muffled whispering until the front-desk woman sauntered out of the room. “Kathleen, his nurse, will take you in” She announced.

There was nothing else I could do so, I lingered by the entrance way. I just barely saw his face when my chest constricted. Helplessly, I held myself by the doorway for a moment longer before turning the corner towards his bed. I was nervous, so nervous. The face that I so loved to stare at held a large, stitched up gash along the hairline. The fluffy, chestnut colored main that he held so much pride in had pieces of glass woven throughout. His chest exposed a large butterfly tattoo that I remembered bugging him about:

"You got a butterfly tattoo?" I had questioned.

"Yeah.It's funny! Isn’t it?" He had said and I rolled my eyes before he pulled me into his chest.

But his chest was no longer inviting. His muscular arms were sheet white with bloody cuts going up and down them and a large, plastic tube went down his throat. One of his legs, his left, was held in a sling, which hung from the ceiling. The rest of his body was covered and my sharp inhalation sent the room quiet.

The nurse, Kathleen, shuffled a pillow underneath of him and pulled a chair near his bed. "I take it you'll be sitting down?" She said and pointed to the chair. I nodded and sat down quietly. He didn't smell the way I remembered. He smelled rather sterile yet oddly sweet in an alarming twist.

I looked up at the nurse."What happened?" I whispered.

The woman stared at me quizzically.

"He got into a car accident." She said and I could feel the sides of my mouth turn down.

"Was he driving?" I asked.

"No. His driver had a heart attack and, umm...,  swerved into a guardrail." She paused for a moment. "He was projected out of the front window."

My heart sank and I looked over at him. I didn’t think I could get more upset but every new piece of  news I received debunked that theory. He seemed so peaceful, lying there. I couldn't even begin to think of that accident happening to him. I reached out for his hand that laid limply next to his body and held it tight. A moan escaped his mouth and I shot my hand away from his.

"Is he alright?" I said frightened. “Did I hurt him?”

"He’s fine." The woman said. "He should be." She fingered through the binder that had been hanging from the foot of his bed. "It says here that he's had a concussion, fractured ribs and a broken leg."

"Oh my God." I said and looked at his closed eyes. “Can he hear us?"

"No. He's knocked out for now. The doctors had to remove to scrap metal. It was only cosmetic, I believe,  but still traumatic. I'll call his doctor in for you. In the meantime, do you want to call his family members? You were the first person we called so no one else has been informed."

"Ah, yes." I said and wiped my eyes. "I'll inform them. Thank you."

The nurse began to walk out of the door when she stopped and turned to me.

"And your highness?" She said and I instinctively turned to face her.

"Yes?" I replied instantly and she smiled. Her suspicions confirmed.

"That will be all."

Once she left, the room felt eerily quiet. The sound of the sloshing and beeping of the machines that were pressed up against his body seemed to vibrate around the small sterile room. I reached out for his hand again, slowly this time. I gently wrapped my fingers around his palm and, with my thumb, rubbed his hand lightly.

"Harry?" I whispered and I waited for an answer until I hopelessly understood that I wasn't likely to get one. "Hi, love." I said and stared at his hand. I knew that I needed to talk to him but I hadn’t a clue what to say. "I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm sorry I didn't want you to sleepover at my hotel suite with me tonight. I know I usually do and, I don't know, I'm just sorry. I was in a bad mood but I didn't mean to put you in that position." I paused. "I'm sorry to hear what happened to your driver. I know you two were close. The woman here knows who I am too and it's not too long until she finds out who you are. I don't know what to do, Harry. Should I call management or keep this a secret? I can always call in for your appointments or call Nate or somebody. If you need me to do something just tell me or show me somehow, I guess."

I laughed at myself. "I'm here for you, Harry. You're the best boyfriend - the best friend a person could ever have. You make me feel like I'm the person I want to be. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me. This is my fault. If I wasn't being so secretive about us I wouldn’t have had to follow you all the way to New York just to spend the night with you. I’m sorry that I didn’t want anyone to know about us in London, you didn’t deserve that. You look at me the way I want to be looked at. " I smiled and looked down at my hand on his. "That's John Green by the way but it's true."

I felt my hand moving when I noticed something. Harry’s thumb pushed at the ring on my finger and ran itself over my knuckles. I giggled. "You're amazing, you know that?" I said and leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek. Like a chain reaction, my heart fluttered, my chest got tight again and my feet felt light. His fingers moved over mine for only a moment longer but I watched their every move. They seemed like magic to me, something I would've taken for granted before. When they stopped moving again, I let go of Harry's hand for a moment. "Let me call your mother, Harry. It will just be a second and I'll stay in this chair, okay?" I spoke to him but he didn't respond. Delicately, I walked over to where my purse lay and quickly dialed her number. Once I returned to my chair, I watched Harry until the call was answered.

"Hello?" A groggy voice said at the other end of the call.

"Amy?" I said.

"Who is this?" Amy said defensively. "And why the bloody hell are you calling me at 7am?"

"Amy. It's me, Lydia."

"Lydia?" Amy said. "What's the matter? You sound tired."

"Amy, I need to talk to you about something serious."

"Oh, no." She laughed. "What has that silly boy done this time?"

"Umm... It's more than that, Amy. Harry's gotten into an accident." There was never a time where you were prepared to tell someone’s loved ones terrible news. It was heartbreaking but I had to tell her. She needed to know.

The line went silent on the other end.

"He, umm..., he's in the hospital here and he's asleep now. I'm still waiting for the doctors to get back to me, but what I've heard from the nurse is that it was a car accident. He has, umm…, a concussion, some fractured ribs and a broken leg. They said he should be fine and that it’s not serious."

Amy was silent for another moment. "Gosh. Is he awake?" She asked.

I moved my gaze over towards Harry. "No, he's been unconscious for quite awhile." I said.

"Thank you for calling me, darling. I'll tell Mia and Ralph. Do you need me to come in? I could catch the first flight out? I- Do they know who you are? I mean, is it safe for you there?"

I paused. "No, I’m fine.” I lied. "Do you think I should tell anyone about Harry? Maybe Nate or someone, if not the management company?" Nate, along with his equal counterpart Jacob, was Harry’s best friend and bandmate.

"Oh, no. Don't tell management. They'll do whatever they can to get him singing again and he needs to rest. Call Nate though and I'll deal with management. I'll say that there has been a family emergency and Harry is here with me. Are you sure you will be okay by yourself? Your family won't call out a search party?" She joked.

I forced a laugh. That was too close to a realistic possibility. "No, don't worry about me." I sniffed. "I'll keep you updated. Sorry to wake you, Amy." I mumbled before hanging up.

The room became silent again and I wondered why I had wanted to be alone for so long. It was maddening. The hospital room screamed sadness. Everything was grey and white but with natural light from the window. I could just picture the corporate idiot who had said to his boss that the natural light helps keep the patients in good spirits but it was such a lie. There was no way in hell that these patients could be kept in good spirits. Especially considering the fact that every container in the room said "Destroy by incineration" and other similarly horrible things.

Harry's hand began to move again and I checked the clock - 1:34am. I bent over his tired body and looked at the man I loved. His sweet expression was still present and I could even see the dimples I love hidden within his face. I sat down next to him and ran my fingers along his hairline slowly and carefully plucking all of the small pieces of glass out of his hair. Suddenly, I heard a knock on the door and a tall built man in a thin, white jacket came strolling into the room, filled with purpose.

I stood up quickly and he spoke, "Hello, I'm Dr. Brooks. I was the on-call E.R. doctor when your husband came in tonight." He extended his hand to me.

"Oh!" I gasped and floundered around until I could put the glass shards onto one of the tables. "I'm Lydia-" I paused. "Lydia Ashton. Pleasure to meet you, doctor."

"Likewise." He said and gave me the look that I hated. He stared into my eyes and made my whole body jump with nervousness. It was the look of someone who suspected my true identity. "Say," He said. "Do I know you from somewhere?"

I looked quickly to the ground. "Oh, no. I grew up in the UK."

"Really? I did my dissertation work there! Right in Central London!" He said and laughed.

I looked over towards Harry. "Oh. Well. I'm from Manchester so…" I let my sentence trail off into the silence before speaking again. "So how is he, doctor?"

The doctor looked into my eyes for another second longer. "Oh, well." He flipped through the clipboard that had been hanging on Harry’s bed but his voice wavered. "When I saw him this morning around midnight, he was pretty beaten up. The paramedics reported that he had been flung from the backseat of a Lincoln Town Car, through the front window and, onto the street, which is pretty severe trauma." I gasped but the doctor didn't look at me this time. "He came in with no identification or medical information, which you'll need to supply for the hospital as I see you haven’t yet." The doctor noted. "Anyway, he has a broken leg from a break in the tibia, a concussion and, due to the fact that some of his ribs are fractured, he has a bit of a difficult time breathing, which is why he's on this ventilator."

"Oh, okay." I mumbled. "Do you know when he’ll be awake?"

Still avoiding eye contact, the doctor stared at his papers, "Today or tomorrow. There's no telling really. It’s up to him at this point."

"Oh," I said. "Will there be any special restrictions or medication that I should be aware of?"

"He'll have to take it easy and he will, most likely, have to take some painkillers. Will that be all, Miss?"

I nodded. "Actually, no. I’ll have the medical information here by morning and I also wanted to ask you something."

The doctor, who had began to leave, turned around. "Yes, Mrs. Ashton?"

"What happened to the driver?"

Dr. Brooks paused. "He didn't make it."

I swallowed. "Thank you. That will be all."

He left the room quietly and left me feeling uncomfortable, standing in the middle of the room.

Harry moaned again and I moved back to my seat. I knew who I had to call so, I dialed the number. Nate answered on the first ring.

"Lydia? What time is it? What's the matter?" His said hurriedly. The concern poured through his voice.

"Hi, Nate. It's about Harry."

"Is everything okay?" He commanded.

"Well, Harry's been in an accident and I need your help."

"An accident?" He echoed. "I'll be there in 5 minutes. Where are you?"

"Nate, please." I said quietly and my voice began to shake. "I need you to go to Harry’s hotel room and get his wallet and find any type of medical information you can, alright?"

"Ok, Lydia." Nate said. "I'll go there right now."

"And Nate?" I said assuming he had hung up.

"Yes?"

"I told the people here that I'm his wife so go along with it, ok? And don't tell management anything. Amy's taking care of it."

"Yes. I'll go over to his house now? Where are you?"

"St. Mary’s Hospital."

"I'll be right there." He hung up briskly.

Harry moved his hand over mine and I giggled. "You're such a flirt, Ashton." I joked.