2:00 AM

I am going to be out of smoke by morning...

out of hope by 2:00 am...

and with just 3 dollars in my pocket, 

I can't afford my favorite friend. 

I always start out running,

mama said slow down before your fall,

but mama I just can't help it 

this world was not made for me at all. 

So baby stop your crying,

no you will never get it back...

that piece of your heart you gave to me,

is the only proof that I have.

I thought I saw you fall,

I know you felt me break...

given the chance to choose again

well I would make the same mistake.

So maybe we are all broken...

and maybe you hold the key...

but maybe you will run away when you see,

the darkest side of me.

So what If I am still running...

So what if I hit your walls...

I would rather shatter at your feet,

than never touch you at all.

I am going to be out of smoke by morning...

out of hope by 2:00 am...

and with just 3 dollars in my pocket, 

I can't afford my favorite brand.

Reviews

[I Am Svetlana]

This was so utterly passionate and raw. This read a lot like a song to me...I saw the story unfold from reading each line. Anyway, nice powerful write!

[sathish kumar]

Very good Polley. The flow of thoughts and your usage of words are interesting. Keep Going.!

[Frontier]

This is lovely! The flow and rhyming is exquisite. Excellent piece of writing, I like every part, wouldn't change anything.

[Tree]

There's some classic Bukowski in this piece, minus the rhyme scheme of course. It's got that matter of fact tone where the poet is essentially saying, I have story to share, and it might not mean anything to you, but it means a whole lot to me.... I'm an insomniac, I know 2:00 am. so it meant a whole lot to me, too. I understood.

Very cool piece JP, enjoyed the second-hand smoke
emanating of this write

Diego

[Ian Gilmour]

We all have our fix and the smokes as a metaphor for love is pretty deep. The fiery passion of being with someone else characterized by the flame we inhale. The only problem is, we can't buy love. Very cool idea. I like this.

[Jessica Lynn Polley]

Thanks I really liked that whole idea to that why I put it in here twice lol. Cigarettes seemed like a really good metaphor for love to me...once you get a good taste your hooked, when you do not have it is all you think about, and it slowly kills you that s three for three. No one commented on this and I thought I was being clever lol so I am glad that you saw it the way I intended.

[willweb]

This really felt like a song as I read it. The rhythm was wonderful and the opening and closing stanzas were great. The entire poem was great. I enjoyed this today.

[Jessica Lynn Polley]

This is a song. :)

[willweb]

Then I enjoyed it even more. Do you have a melody?

[Jessica Lynn Polley]

Yes I do. The third stanza is the chorus...the rest are verses. There are actually 4 verses I just did not put it all on here.

[willweb]

I could definitly hear it singing as I read it. It is very good. If you ever record it and post it somewhere, please drop me a message.

[Jessica Lynn Polley]

I will definitely to do that thank you.

[Yours Truly]

Loved the rhyming scheme in this one, and the emotion expressing sometimes how one can feel after feeling like they showed too much of themself to someone before or that's how I connected with it but it's always a joy reading your poetry. :)
-Yours Truly

[Ryan Riley]

I love this write! Powerful emotion and something I totally can relate too. Identifying with what you think of yourself and whether or not someone will be able to deal with it...

[Cory Barrett]

Running until the breaking point, shattering others expectations.