Leaves Fall

A tanka about leaves.

Leaves Fall

Leaves torn from branches

Flutter down to the ground

Hitting with a deathly impact

Do they stay in a dead state?

Come back next year, energized.

Not pieces of decay

Author's Note

I spent a long time writing this tanka poem. I usually don’t write forms of poetry, mostly free verse. I find that I am unable to express myself in a limited amount of syllables or lines…
So this was a bit of a change for me. Tanka poems are supposed to have 30 syllables total, (5-7-5-7-7) so the last line has an error. I couldn’t find a word though to sneak in there. Also the title has a bit of a play on words. As the leaves physically do “fall”, but also that it’s the season fall! But I hope you enjoyed this read, reviews appreciated.

Reviews

[cassandra violet]

This was great! I like how the ending is full of hope, it was unexpected and a nice surprise!

[Marie Harrison]

Lovely, I love falls leaves. A wonderous time of the year!

[tynamite]

30 syllables must be a challenge. The poem seems to have a chopped up and broken sort of flow to it, so in a way, the poem structure fits leaves falling.

[Aven]

I like the idea... alot :)

[Poetic Beauty]

I actually like the uniqueness of this piece and love how you ended it.

[Kate Hunter]

very well written. Tanka is a very hard form of poetry in my perspective. Good Job.

[MuSe Ampoule]

Good job! Definitely the time of year for this! I agree with Snuffle about the last line, some sort of textural word like dry or something like old or spent...but not on the state/State thing...it's not a place.

[hannajade]

ahh its very cool, i love fall, its my favourite season.
once a upon a time I wrote about a million haiku, which is kinda like that but only three lines and seventeen syllables. (5,7,5) ...... lol

[Goodbye]

Lovely musing of autumns meaning...

[Nothing Personal]

More than the form of the poem, ( I really fuss very little about norms), your thought in this poem though simple actually is a very profound thought. Leaves fall away, wither but you see em green n shining again. This is the basic form of life. As some vanishes in oblivion, others rise from nowhere..
I liked the thought and the simplicity of verse.
Last line suggestion: Not withered, decayed.