The Day I Lost Destiny

The Day I Lost Destiny

     I was searching, searching for the answer to my questions. I couldn't put my hands into something so interesting, to get me away from the solitude that I'm into. I've been alone ever since I was a kid. Almost twelve years ago, my parents were killed from a bombing on the eleventh of September and I was left with my grandfather who is only partly alive from the sleeping pills he takes every night.

 

     He told me to buy some books and try reading them to let myself escape from the real world, where I would usually suffer from the pain that my parents are not here. I know it's too overly-dramatic of me for not moving on, but maybe because they were the best people I had in my life. I do have a few friends but they were too busy to hang out with me. I know they were lying. 

 

     What the hell will I buy? I thought to myself, lingering in every corner of the crowded bookstore. It was a Wednesday summer morning and the management turned up the air conditioner higher than usual. In spite of the hotness floating outside of the shop under the blazing sun, I was rubbing my arms in complete sync for friction. But my attempt didn't do that well. 

 

     Romance. Teen Fiction. Supplementary. Children's. Mystery. General Information. Fantasy. Adventure. How about adventure? It wouldn't be that worse than romance, would it? Not that I hate romance or such stories, I haven't had the time for love yet, even a speck. However, I did felt an affection towards my dog, a Labrador Retriever. 

 

     As I paced around the Adventure section, my eyes got attracted to a hardbound book standing on a plastic frame. From That Day Forward. On the cover, there was a knight rising against a high, sturdy mountain, holding a bloody yet shining sword. Since I loved men in armours ever since I was little, I decided to pick it up. At the mere second that I was about to do that, another's hand suddenly grasped the book, too, copying my very motion. 

 

     She turned her head towards me and gazed at me with her wide eyes. And yes, it's a girl. Because of my curiosity, I felt the urge to take a look at her, too. The moment I did, I can barely stand from my position. 

 

     The very first thing I saw was her eyes. They were a pair of blue that sunk me deep into an ocean. Her hair was resting at the top of her chest and a few strands were flowing behind her like a burst of chocolate fountain. It was unlikely brown, with a touch of caramel along the edges and it was running until her middle back. Her white complexion made me peek at her a little more and it was so fair that a model can die for that skin colour. Despite all of these facets, I cannot get a move on over her eyes. It was so innocent that you can call her innocence a beautiful thing. 

 

    Her hand was above mine as I felt a sudden shock of electricity within me. Her hold was cold and frigid from the atmosphere that it gave a long line of chills behind my back. After it happened for minutes, or should I say for a second, she immediately removed her hands away. 

 

     "I'm sorry. You take it. You were the first one anyway." It was the first time I heard her voice. Soft. Reserved. Impeccable. It was a pure distraction from anyone who is busy doing something, like from that point, we were the only beings in the whole book store, like all people were gone for a second, for a minute. 

 

     "No, it's fine. I didn't even know what to pick at all." I insisted and took my hands away as well, gesturing her to take the book herself. 

 

     She studied me closely like I'm a display at a museum, and closer than I expected. "I'm suggesting that you're a new reader, aren't you?" she said, raising one of her eyebrows in amusement. 

 

     "Yes, I think so." I answered. 

 

     "Well then," she began, almost startling me in surprise by her quick reply, "I'll help you with that. I'm a book extraordinaire!"

 

     She was funny, too.

 

     "Okay, Mr. New Guy. Let's start in the Fantasy section. Do you like elves? Or mages that do unbelievable magic?" she asked. I never liked anything from them since my cousin told me that they weren't real. But I guess I should try. "Yeah, sure." And from that very second, I know that I will have a great journey with her on looking for my right kind of book. 

 

     We went to different book shelves and racks and even had a time to play hide-and-seek abaft them. She was happy and carefree, like all of her problems easily disappeared. I wish I was like her. Cheery and at ease. Maybe if I can read a book now, I can be as joyful as how she usually feels. 

 

     She was open and receptive like a book. In every turn of a page, she can tell you everything she's been through without you asking it. All I can say is Man, this girl is perfect. She can handle anything, but she told me it was because of books. She can go as far as the books can take her. And I realized, that was my problem. From the fact that I often feel lonely and improbable, I needed something to look forward to. Or someone.

 

     I spent the whole afternoon with her, like what best friends do. But in contempt of what I just mentioned, an old lady assumed us as a couple who is therefore in a romantic relationship. Seems fair enough for me, but she instantly told the lady that we were only acquaintances and that she already has a boyfriend to be in a relationship with me. Okay, now it seems logical. It would be impossible for her not to have her own guy, I know. The lady even doubted it and she looks disappointed that there is another guy and she hoped it was me instead. "She's a keeper." she mouthed and the only thing I can do is to put on a shy smile. Beats me.

 

     As we continued along to the aisle of Teen Fiction, which I am utterly disgusted with, I asked her, "So, you have a boyfriend?" 

 

     "Yeah, I think so." She sounds unsure of it somehow, but I never wanted anything to be remarkably awkward so we proceeded on to finding a few books. 

 

     Finally, we landed on our final chapter, at the counter, bringing with me three books of her choice. The Tyson Theory, which is a mystery-thrilled book, Zoe and Zoey, a romance novel, and of course, why would we forget this, From That Day Forward, a historical fiction that we both found on our first meeting. And as funny as it sounds, I never really tried reading the caption of Zoe and Zoey since I never read romance novels myself. Although I convinced her not to give it to me, she forcibly did. And she forcibly made me to let her pay for the second book. I don't know why, but she demanded.

 

     Speaking of, I didn't know this girl. Really, all this time that I've been with her, I didn't ask for her name. So. F*cking. Stupid. I spun around to question her and what I saw behind me was nothing. She wasn't there. Since she didn't inform me of her name, I have precisely no idea what to shout and so I rather yelled, "Hey! Girl with a brown hair who was with me just a second ago, are you there?" Then, like a storm, every eyeball was on me, especially brunettes. But they didn't seem to get my attention and they were definitely different from the girl I was looking for. 

 

     The very second I left the counter, I came searching for her, for the girl who has a hair of the deepest colour of browns, yet each brown-haired females aren't worth looking at. I thought we were playing another game of hide-and-seek again, but I realized we weren't, from the fact that she had been gone for nearly an hour. I scanned everywhere, every pile of books, every corner, every shelf, and even behind the cash register, which is by far the most foolish thing I did. "F**k off!" Wow, that is one feisty clerk. By the way, I never asked him. 

 

     "Hey, have you seen a girl who-"

 

     "I said, f**k off and leave my holy a*s alone." Man, this guy is serious. 

 

     Leaving him with a queue of worried and agitated customers, I went outside instead. Nevertheless, how can I ever find a girl that I didn't know her name, nor do I have any contact, in such a huge place? Who will possibly locate a certain person here in New York? Totally impossible.

 

     She was gone. I was left. Left with an unforgettable memory of her and distinctly unanswered questions like, where do you live, can I have your number, or what the hell is your name. I stood there, in front of the book store like a hopeless romantic who thinks that there is a possibility where I might somehow ran into her on the way home. But that thought was effortlessly drifted away in the midsummer air. The sun was about to set and I got more baffled as I waited for a cab to take me wherever I had to be. 

 

     I was left clueless. Never did I see that girl again. The girl with the hair of nutella. 

Reviews

[Zachary_James]

That was absolutely excellent, you are a brilliant writer. I loved every second of this chapter and the two girls, they were just lovely to read about, I will say I almost cried a little during the beginning. So eloquently written, and yet portrayed stunningly.

[Cynthia Green]

Thank you so much.. oh and the other one is not a girl. A guy is telling the story. Just correcting.

[Zachary_James]

My apologies