Fine Line

 

Sipping slowly

to savor the flavor

only to choke on the taste

of the fruits of my labor.

 

So…

 

I look out the window

that is clearer than hindsight

only to see a blue sky

through scratched lenses.

 

Then…

 

Laying down in bed

so I can find a new dream

only to wake in agony

from the pleasure I see.

 

Now..

 

My mind is on the edge

of philosophical madness

searching for the perfection

within imperfection.

Reviews

[Katchzen]

Those first four lines are going to be stuck in my head for awhile. Quite awhile, I'm sure. It makes me think...We're all trying to get what we want in life, trying to work towards some kind of goal, but what if we're heading in the wrong direction and we don't even know it? Reaching for something that's actually behind us without even knowing? What happens if we get to the end and we think "This isn't what I wanted at all"?

One of the things I love about your writing is that I always end up with something to think about, even if it probably wasn't what you intended.

[Desert Dreamer]

Brilliant. My favorite things in life are the perfections within the imperfections...this is a poem to read slowly and ponder the meanings.

[yelena]

There is perfection in imperfection the moment you open your heart to the world..A fine write, thanks for sharing.

[Helena]

A comtemplative write, admirably penned and enjoyable read. Well done!

[Norma M Sutton]

Confusingly appropriate. Such is life :)

[Fran Marie]

we have to weigh the pros and cons of life and try to find that right balance
to so many things beautifully penned and well expressed in lovey verse

[Georgia Gypsy]

Perfect imperfection, the ultimate thing we all are and dont know it. The depth of this piece is great, could easily debate how each part fits into the day to day life.
Wonderfully written:)
K

[anne p. murray- LadeeAn..]

Intellectually engaging.
Maybe...just maybe, hindsight could be better then foresight. I'm sure many of us have regrets; I know I do. Seriously....haven't we all had a few' fits' of madness at some time in our lives; leaving philosophical scars of imperfection.
Great write

[Liza]

philosophical madness....ahhh - to live in our head too much can feel like we are going mad....i know the feeling but you have penned it precisely...

[Hayley]

I love it. The first stanza really opens up this poem for emotion, and the last couple lines is final. It is a simple poem, but I love the images you conjure up, especially the phrase "through scratched lenses". This is like the story of my life, thanks for the great read.

[MuSe Ampoule]

Great rhythm and flow to this. I love how it just pours us down your thoughts like a Niagara River free fall. Hindsight's a b***h...I do try so hard to never look back. The first stanza was powerful...lots of great lines, the whole poem in fact.