Phil and His Big Cracker A*s Mouth

He shouldn't have but he did

Phil got thrown off  Duck Dynasty
For shooting off his trap
Rednecks hating on gays again
It's the usual crap

Bullshit reality celebrities
The fame goes to their head
Say something stupid in the press
and liberals want them dead

Old Phil just said what he believed
To bad it was hateful
Out of step with the liberal press
They all should be grateful

Now they have the perfect face
for everything they hate
A dumb as f**k inbred redneck
served on a dinner plate

Point to Phil evil incarnate
an old school kind of hick
For quoting biblical scripture
that regulate his dick

Dumb hillbillies are everywhere
My family's full of them
I might just be kin folk to Phil
By redneck gene pool stem

I'm a great shot with a rifle
No stranger to explosives
I got sent to a foreign land
to f**k up all the natives

Don't you see I might just be
The redneck you're looking for
So I'll just phone up A&E
And say to search no more

I promise not to hate on gays
So give me my own show
Ricochet's reality street
He's just another schmo

Author's Note

You know I've never seen duck dynasty.

Reviews

[Muse]

Ughhhhh...I've been hiatus on the café for personal reasons...my husband was browsing through your work and shared this poem of yours with me...I felt an uneasy stirring in my soul "I wanted to stay silent" but in doing that it will eventually turn into word vomit, so I needed to purge. First off, his comments were made during a GQ interview, he never said this stuff on air. And btw, did you know that were editing out the word "Jesus" every time he said grace on the show? Since when did Jesus become a bad word? If he was praying to the almighty Allah I'm sure nobody would have cared. I'm tired of double standards. Why is it okay for a gay person to be open about their sexuality, yet if somebody is open about their beliefs it becomes brash and rude? We cannot punish somebody about their beliefs or restrict this practice in any way. If we do, we are jeopardizing our freedom of speech as we know it. Eventually we will get arrested for saying the word "fat" just ask Jennifer Lawrence, according to her that word should be illegal. It's called suck it up and get a f*****g backbone people. If you don't like it...just turn the TV off!

[Baby Ricochet]

Apparently old Phil violated his contract with his network by talking trash about a powerful, politically connected group who sponsors don't need boycotting their products in the market place. Phil does have the right to say what he wants and his supporters have the right to gather around him just like his detractors have a right to cry foul and his bosses have a right to fire him for contract violation. I've never seen his show and I'm not gay, black or particularly PC so I've no vested interest in the story.

[Baby Ricochet]

I'm a poet who writes satire so to me it was good grist for a poem. I'll tell you this much though. You talk some s**t about vets or the marine Corps I'll be so far up your a*s my head will be stuck in your colon so I can understand where his detractors are coming from. Thanks for stopping by muse. I appreciate it

[Baby Ricochet]

I should have wrote anyone talk s**t about the marine Corps. I wasn't directing that comment at you

[Kenneth The Poet]

Strangely enough, I am on Phil's side. I am a libertarian but I am irreligious. If he wants to say what he believes out loud, he's not exactly suffering in the money department. He could be bought out of his company quietly and he probably wouldn't mind because his faith means more to him than a pile of cash. Of course, I could be wrong. Seriously though, the social conservatives are starting to gain some ground politically again because it 2014, and that means primary season is around the corner. He'll be a hero and he'll speak at CPAC soon.

As for the poem, you are a master of the abab rhyme scheme and your ability for satire is top-notch.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Kennith. I appreciate it

[Kenneth The Poet]

Not a problem at all.

[Latifa]

any one has the right to say what he believes in and if he hates gays let him, he has the right to do so
I don't know what happenned to the world it's like if you say you don't like gay community every one jumps on you in full attack.
we all have the right to say what we want where we want and when we want to

[Baby Ricochet]

So do the people who are jumping all over him for it

[QuietlyCrash]

I honestly don't see the big deal in all of this. Who gives a f**k about whether or not he hates the gays or his hiding the fact that he is one? This is a really clever poem and it pokes a good deal of fun at all the hullabaloo surrounding whatever hard hitting news headline this was. I agree you should have your own show, I'd watch. Thanks for sharing, Baby. Always lovely to read your work.
-Riley

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you Riley. It's good to hear from you.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

We either have freedom for all or freedom for none. Freedom of speech is meant to protect all speech, not just the politically acceptable speech for the left. I respect everyone's right to say whatever they want. Likewise, I respect another person's right to disagree and have an opinion of his own. What I don't agree with is censoring that which you do not like.

[Baby Ricochet]

For sure. Thanks for stopping by Linda. I appreciate it.

[Mark]

Phil is an old dumb redneck. But then these reality shows are scripted so who knows if that's what he's really like?. I think A&E saw a chance to get free publicity and ran with it. Personally the duck show is kind of boring. Like you I got a few relatives that would fit right in and nothing on the show is really new to me lol

[Baby Ricochet]

For sure. Thank you Mark

[Tai Ryens]

Oh goodness, you absolutely deserve your own show, that would be hilarious and entertaining to watch!

[Baby Ricochet]

I think so. It's gotta be better than a bunch of hillbillies killing anything that moves. That was my childhood man.

[Tom]

Our forefathers fought oppressors and many paid the ultimate sacrifice for our liberty, freedom and right of free speech, it's called democracy and I'm very proud of each and every one of them. So how dare anyone tell me in my country what way to behave, dress speak etc! If you don't like the programme then change the freekin channel dude !

Another poetic piece Rico and as ever, there's a very pertinent point therein ! RIP Bernard Manning !

[Baby Ricochet]

Phil got fired for contract violations about what he could or couldn'tsay in public so it's not like he wasn't warned in advance .
As a private Citizen Phil does have the right to express himself and so do the people he pissed off. What's between him and his network

[Baby Ricochet]

What's between him and his network is a private affair

[Corset]

I've never watched it either Baby. I like your attitude.

[Baby Ricochet]

Thank you corset

[Scott Metro]

A person like that shouldn't have a personal opinion....LOL...only those that are PC should be able to express themselves......
What a world.

Scott

[Baby Ricochet]

He does have a right to express himself. So do the people he pissed off

[Scott Metro]

Agree....but you cannot require everyone to think or speak just for your comfort..grow some thicker skin..Chairman Mao banned certain words..certain trains of thought..is that the new America ?...I speak my mind..if a person doesn't like..he can say so..I don't care what he thinks..
If he wants to pursue further he best have a bigger gun than me and that is unlikely..call me a homophobe...I'll tell you to stick it up your *ss. Gee isn't it a nice day...LOL
Scott

[Baby Ricochet]

Phil got fired for contract violations about what he could or couldn'tsay in public so it's not like he wasn't warned in advance. Personally I thought the Paula dean n word scandal was way more stupid than this one. All she did was admit to using the n word back in the day before it wasn't pc. At least Phil's phopa is current. Being a satirist to me it's inspiration