In the Rain

 

Blonde hair, blue eyes

We stare up into the sky

Wishing on a rain cloud

As the thunder roars loud

Trees sway in the wind

As we start to spin

In the rain, in the rain

Trees sway

Sky and ground collide

Lightening brightens the world

As we twirl

The wind sings

It's sad tale of loss, false love

And lies, lies, lies

You know you and I, you and I

We will fly

Away from here

Away from fear

No more tears, no more, no tears

The rain peirces me like knives

Blonde hair, blue eyes

In the rain, in the rain

Trees sway

Author's Note

Thanks for reading, please review and rate. I'm trying to get to a 95% rating! :) (I do not own the picture)

Reviews

[Palmer Blu]

This piece is definitely an attention grabber! The poem opens up with such description that it makes me yearn for more. The repetition in this poem is great, which is shocking because repetition can sometimes destroy the piece. The words are placed brilliantly and this is a key factor when writing poetry. Every image that you attempt to paint is pulled off flawlessly and I commend you that. Overall this ia great poem and you are clearly an amazing poet!

[Michael X]

this captures innocence and romance like a picture perfect blue day,
reminds me of life and longing to be creative, the imagery
is stately crafty, excellent job :)

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Beautiful imagery in a well written love poem!

[megaluv92]

I love it. The line "lightning brightens the world" is magical.

[Jazique]

Very descriptive in nice of pouring meaning something more.

[MuSe Ampoule]

Not sure why you're focusing on the rating score...this is really good and should stand on it's own with ease.

Actually, in my mind I heard song lyrics...a great song that in my mind could be sung by Flyleaf or a band of that sort... :)

[Desert Dreamer]

If one spins enough in the rain will we become a swaying tree? This poem is magical...

[InkSlinger]

Nice way of incorporating nature into this love poem. I enjoy the imagery that this piece creates.. felt like I was walking beside you, in the rain.. Well done!

[Solitaire-P0ette]

I love it...the main force is nature. the good and nature...the bad in nature...what it stands for. this poem is great

[Misty Blue Eyes]

this is a great write

[RJM]

Beautiful poem, lost love mixed with nature's fury.