moving to the suburbs of semantic renaissance

moving to the suburbs of semantic renaissance 

 

 

a littered street

shattered lamppost 

tenements half-hidden

in a maze of graffiti sprayed

pages

 

inspiration consumed by

words left in traps

tongues chewed off like legs

a mist of old clothing clinging

 

like wraps

around wounds

the themes all moved out of the city

and chaotic rhymes

shuffled in,

 

unfinished symphonies

provide soundtrack

 

as ideas are swept like windblown flotsam

along concrete lines

from which we no longer find a high

 

so we bang keys in frustration

looking for high country

in our underground minds

 

still hoping our silent ears

might hear the music

that is caught 

in the throat of creativity.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/8/16

Reviews

[Paul Bell]

Every time i'm stuck in a traffic jam, i think to myself, wouldn't it be great to be in the country. The slow pace, the stillness, back to nature. Unfortunately, when i'm in country, i panic at the slow pace, the peace.
Sadly i'm just a urbanite with country thinking.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

when i was a kid...i was an urbanite with country thinking...now i am pure country...
thanks, Paul...
j.

[Deuces]

I took this as vast, vast (and genius) metaphor. The concrete jungle being the convoluted outline of the writer's mind in an urge to leave the turbulence and land safely in literary suburbia. Almost a constant cycle with no end. Masochism, but one that is necessary for our existence.

Awesome as always, Sir.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Cyntax...love your insights.

j.

[Sami Khalil]

Sometimes we have to move away from the hustle and bustle of crowded cities, bad internet traffic, long lines of mayhem, stupid arguments of literature and find peace and harmony in the suburbs and fields of creativity. Get a fresh start, a serene outlook away from the concrete jungle or juggle. An excellent write from a master....:))))

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and a beautifully insightful comment, Sami...

thank you

j.

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome muchly. .....:))))

[Lyn Anderson]

I feel like this poem is about three things at once -- the author's desire to create and be heard, confusion and being misunderstood, and the sadness of our broken down concrete jungles ... I am really partial to that second stanza. :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insights, KL...

j.

[Bacchus]

balance...
sometimes we need to withdraw ourselves from concrete
so when we come in contact with it again it does bring a high

i'm caught- maybe this relationship is in the bringing up babies stage
nothing wrong with a little security

somehow though the birth, the symphonies and creativity that's caught
probably will only be accepted in this more dangerous, more homelessness place
of a home

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful review, Bacchus...

j.

[Tina Kline]

A very powerful poem. You bring to life the situation on in the inner city's in your profound creative way.

I'm impressed.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Tina.

j.

[Tina Kline]

You are very welcome.

[Alfred Kukitz]

I just got wowed! I liked the title, you come up with some real doozys. Anyway, what a piece of writing. In winter these folks wear coats of atrophy. What a story Jacob!

Great work!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Al...

j.

[Marianne Rose]

Whoa- pretty dark, but I like it anyway. Somehow I feel, I don't know, reprimanded somehow? But I certainly love the images of the battered city . . . mixed with the images of ideas/art butchered . . . definitely get the frustration, and grief? bitterness? anger? Interesting and really disturbing.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for sharing your feelings about and from this piece, Marianne...glad it could touch a nerve...

j.