A Letter

Sometimes, it's so bad that I need to remind myself it'll be okay.

I tell myself to write a letter

A “I know you’re manic right now but it gets better”

Make it hopeful

Poetic

So that when I read it

I won’t kill myself

I have written enough letters in my lifetime to know

This one won’t help

It will not stick

I will crumble it up and throw it away like before

I will reach for my unconcealed razor blade once again

A metaphor, maybe

Or another cry for help

Wishful thinking that someone will see it

It’s funny because I keep trying to use it

I press it against my wrist

Until it indents

But the skin never breaks

There’s no blotchy trail of red

I guess I don’t have it in me anymore

I am too tired

Exhausted by the temptation

Maybe it means I’m getting better

Maybe I no longer need to open myself up

To look inside

Wouldn’t that be nice?

No more grief

No more despair

Just in case

I make myself write a letter

One where happiness is not guaranteed

But being alive is

And hope that it’s enough

Reviews

[Chris]

Please don't get so lost in your own pain and darkness that you can't realize others FEEL theirs too and can be just as lost and alone and HURTING ...waiting for another to reach for them with understanding what that "IT" is all about and NEEDING some OTHER person to recognize the pains felt if only to somehow validate the realness and just to somehow touch fingertips so each other's tears have a path to flow back and forth instead of falling alone into the darknesses.