Heaven's Denial

I'm not sure but I think this poem was unconsciously inspired by Edgar Allan Poe's "Annabelle Lee". Nonetheless, this poem speaks about the liability I have over the consequences of what I feel.

Seraph of paradise behold,

Whose love blesses me,  

Who dims not nor withers old,

Though Time pass and be �"

 

Shall I trespass thine eyes

And thou trespass mine,

To unveil our love’s guise

And its truest form shine?

 

Or love be buried forever,

In the silence of the heart,

Be exhumed no longer,

And our paths truly part?

 

Ah, let there be no question,

Nor answer in compliment;

Love excels beyond reason,

Yet yields to Fate’s judgment!

 

If Fate shall grant our request,

That our love perish not,

Yet more fragrant, more zest, 

As Time battter and wrought.

 

Alas, it is uncertain, my dear,

Shall Fate make her decree,

And our love be forbid, I fear,

For there is no woman like thee!

 

And if thine heart be sentenced,

To love no more, to eternal exile,

I hope thy pains are recompensed,

My soul be of Heaven’s denial!

Reviews

[Lavon Forkeeps]

This was extremely impressive. Your way with words flatters me while I read (: You're on to something pretty awesome. Good job.

[Summer D.]

Gorgeous choice of language. There's a certain flow of mysteriousness in this poem which I really, really, really like. It's nice to see another writer on WC who shares the same sort of writing preference. I have no qualms about this poem except maybe devise another clever way to allude to Fate instead of constantly repeating it through the poem? It doesn't take away from the beauty of your piece; it's just an idea that I'd like to throw out there. I hate repeating words over and over ( if I can help it ) and I like to practice " show not tell " every once in awhile.

YT,

Summer

[PieceMaker]

For only 15 years old, your word choice and general expression of your thoughts is impeccable.