Cutie pie

Josh Moore was a poor man. He led a bad life, a sad life; was twenty-five, no kids, no wife. Just an old mother, who croaked more than she spoke, was a terrible bathroom poet, and had been going gaga lately.

“Oh Almighty, what did I do to deserve this life?" Josh's mother began. "Are you angry with me? And what about my husband? Is he still crossed with the epitaph I got engraved on his tombstone? I really don't know what's the fuss about.”

“Grow up, mother. Be thankful the landlord didn't kick us out when he saw you sharing the beer with his dog. As for the epitaph? Seriously, woman - “The belt to our jeans, the toast to our beans, RIP, by all means.” If father was alive, he'd die reading that.” Josh chided.

“Truth is all I write. Your father was so dear to us!”

“Anyway. I got you a new phone.”

“Oh Almighty, what did I do to deserve this life! What did I do to deserve this handsome young man as my son! God bless, God bless.” She said, snatching the phone from Josh’s hands.
“Ooh, what are all these new apps. Got to check them out!”

“I hope you won't waste your-”

“Oh my God, that's the ChitChat app! Have to open an account right away!” She couldn't hide her excitement. In no time she was shouting at the top of her lungs- “I found Beth, I found Beth!” It sounded as if she just came across a long lost friend. Beth lived only a few blocks away.

“Calm down, mother.”

“Look, she posted a picture!”

She pressed the phone into Josh’s face. He squinted. It was a family picture. Beth Gibson, her old, serious-looking husband, and her cute, little son sleeping soundly in her lap who looked more like a cute soft-toy. The caption read- “Happy birthday, angel”

“I've got to comment on that!" She exclaimed. "Oh look at you. Aren’t you something! May God bless you and may you live a long and happy life. Happy Birthday, cutie pie!” With a lot of cringeworthy emojis. Sent.

“God, he's grown so fast. I remember visiting Beth around four months ago at the time of her delivery.” Josh contemplated.

“Right you are. Hasn't been much time since his bir- wait a minute.” Josh’s mother stopped midway. Her new phone beeped.

Beth Gibson: My husband said thank you.

Author's Note

Feedback/suggestions all appreciated :)

Reviews

[.]

A humourous little piece, Zoe....

I can see that your time away from the cafe hasn't lessened your storytelling prowess, and indeed the paragraphing of the dialogue and continuation of the story flow is a new skill you have acquired.

Just about every family has a member similar to Josh's Mother and i sure pity the poor guy! That epitaph was highly original and quite funny, as was the old biddy's fascination and teenage excitement for the new phone. And your twist at the conclusion did bring a smile.

Great to have you back writing on the cafe again, Zoe. You sure didn't miss much in your absence, though. Another fine short story. Well Done.

[Zoya]

Don't know about others, but I sure didn't miss much from you! Your new one is in my archive already :)
Thank you for the warm welcome, just happy to be back!
And thank you for your appreciation of this piece, Doodley. Missed those reviews!

[.]

Always welcome, Zoe. As welcome as an Indian cricket victory on British soil!! :)))

[Zoya]

NOPE. As welcome as a brain fade on the Indian soil :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked the story. Feel of real life and real people. I liked the complete story in the poem. Especially the ending. Thank you dear Zoya for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Zoya]

Thank you so much, Coyote, for your kind comment. I appreciate it :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[Vin]

This one's cute as the title suggests. Keep writing.

LOVE!

[Zoya]

Thank you! Glad you liked it :))

[angel]

Lord, how different MY reaction was when I was given my first cell phone. "The reason I go out," I told my son, "Is so that no one will be able to bother me, for a while.That's why I never hooked up that darned answering machine you gave me, I don't want everybody and their grandmother bothering me when I'm not even at home!" But, alas, the times, they are a-changing, and now I find myself able to be pestered at every hour of every day.

[Zoya]

Haha, I can only imagine!
I appreciate the time and review, angel. Thank you! :)

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

ooohwow i loved this cute little story so true to life
love your style good work

[Zoya]

Thank you so much, Julie! :)

[emipoemi]

Quite the absurdist piece you've written here, Zoe. I'm a little puzzled about certain details like why the old lady needs a new phone anyway, and why she would be excited about all the new apps.....somethings aren't quite explained. Also, it's best to mention who's speaking as soon as possible, otherwise it could get confusing. For example: that first bit of dialogue could be misconstrued as being spoken by Josh himself by how you worded the opening sentences, so you should put the clarification that it's the mother speaking after "almighty" so the reader isn't left hanging for so long or thinking that it indeed is Josh.

This is otherwise well done indeed. Much enjoyed.

[Zoya]

I'll make those changes!
Thank you for the time and review, emi! :)

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.

[Amada]

Ending 👌👌👌.
Thanks for sharing.

[Zoya]

Thank you for the read :))

[Najam Us Saher]

The Epitaph😂
I cannot get over it. Really liked the twist in the end. Wonderful story.

[Zoya]

Thanks a lot, Najam! Means much :)

[Najam Us Saher]

You are always welcome dear :)

[Elizabeth]

loved the humorous twist at the end...the character of Josh's mother was very well written and i couldn't help but giggle at the epitaph. A really fun read :)

[Zoya]

Thank you so much for the kind words! Glad you enjoyed :)

[Elizabeth]

it was my pleasure:)

[wordman]

zoe,i didn`t know you was such a great story teller,this is good

[Zoya]

Thank you, wordman! I really appreciate that :)

[wordman]

you`re welcome