Angel of One Wing

Angel of One Wing

A Poem by Frieda P
"

A very dear friend of mine sent me that wonderful picture, which inspired this. As survivors, we've always called ourselves one winged angels. Enjoy.

"
Angel
 with the fractured wing 
whispers
 on a zephyr's snowflake
catches
 the tears of sullen eyes
blowing kisses
 per messages of love
         bubble wraps 
your heart for safe keeping 
floats
    on a periwinkle cotton candy pillow
no broken element
 can deny your potent power
                 like a candle flickering
 in a strong gust of wind &
crashing roar of waves at high tides fury
the cries of great warrior's 
           forging survival in battle
no wreckage
 will snuff your courage nor strength
soaring ever so softly
 to save the lives of myriad crush
carrying the other one winged angels
 with felicitous fortitude's 
conviction
 onto billows of silk
 for a safe place to gently fall


                                                                        
                                                                                       
                        

                                                             

 

© 2013 Frieda P


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I found the assonance (sullen eyes, roar of waves) and alliteration (cotton candy, potent power) to be distracting. I'm not sure if you planned those things, but I prefer seeing them in a romantic or humorous poem. Maybe it's just me.

Because, this is much more than just sparks and fire. This is strong and straight-forward. "no wreckage will snuff your courage" is, for me, the lines that best animates the poem.

And I got here from the "heart over mind" contest, which asked to review a poem that's already entered in the contest. I thought it was a great, nimble idea. Hope you reviewed someone's poem too.

Good day. Keep writing.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

11 Years Ago

Thank you kindly for your review, as for the cotton candy, I wanted something light and ethereal...d.. read more



Reviews

Wow very powerful and very beautiful. Thanks so much for sharing.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

11 Years Ago

Thanks Ahmad, this is a special one to me. Glad you like it.
Wow!!!!!!!
Amazing my dear

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


love the set up, this is a wonderful beuatiful write.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


Beautiful, I love that together we can fly.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


A single tear...

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago


this is one amazing peice wonderful job

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 11 Years Ago



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2400 Views
26 Reviews
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Added on January 2, 2013
Last Updated on February 20, 2013
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Author

Frieda P
Frieda P

NJ



About
If you want to know me, read my poetry, it's all in there. I am a mother of three sons (my finest moments) a sister, a survivor and a little bit crazy. I lost my beloved sister to suicide, so you'll.. more..

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