Tracy

I wish I can say this is not a true story but it is and I'm stuck with it its a memory

I was just getting home from schools my mom wasn't home my little sister was at day care. When he showed up he was tall skinny with Brownish reddish hair I knew who he was he was an old friend of my dad and mom his name was Tracy he wanted to see my mom. I told him she was at work and to come back some other time but he insisted on waiting for her. I didn't know what to do so I said sure I liked him then he sat on the couch and turned on the TV and watched it for awhile then he got bored and asked me to follow him to my mom’s room I asked why he said he needed help with something I didn't ask why I followed him in there it was the worst mistake ever when we got in there he closed the door and told me to take my shirt of I said no he smacked me and repeated his question I said no again he got out a bag of quarters and told me I will give you this bag of quarters it adds up to $50.25 I said no please leave me alone he got mad and hit me then through the quarters at me all of them ripped my shirt off me told me to take my bra off not wanting him to hurt me again I took it off. He looked at me for two or three minutes then left without a word I sat there crying for a will then knowing my mom won't believe me she didn't believe me when I told her about uncle Charles so I wiped my tears and went to my room covering my chest on the way and put on a new shirt and I went to do the dishes for her and I never told anyone tell maybe two months later and she didn't believe Me that's when I started to cut and I got away with it for maybe a year or so my dad remarried and had my brother's he noticed some of them and asked me what they are I tried the trick I used on my friend and teachers but it didn't work he knew I started to cry and told him what Tracy did he told me you and your little sister aren't going back to your moms you live with me now then he called the police and they told him they can't do anything without prove so he drove to Tracy's houses and beat him up and told him to stay the f**k away from my little girl and they stopped being friends. My mom on the other hand was still his friend and thought I was just seeking attention I distanced myself from her and soon started to hate her I disclaimed her.

Now two years later I live with my dad and my step mom who is my ma now I only cut when I can't handle the nightmares and my friends noticed a change in me I stopped being outgoing I'm broken for Tracy is not the only one there are more he's just the only I can write about without wanting to cut or going in a depression state of mind he is not the first and was not the last or the worst there was five of them one was raping me repeatedly. But let's not get in to them.

Author's Note

I'm not very good at writing stories but for some reson I had to share one of my bad memories had to get it out of my head it sorta worked sorry if there's mistakes in it but like I said I'm not good at writing stories

Reviews

[Renvek]

Here I sit after reading your story angry with what happened to you. No little girl should have to face the nightmares that you have to had to face. I applaud your dad for defending you and only wish you the best. Some advice for the cutting, I understand that you feel the need to when you are depressed. I can empathize with you concerning the depression and what I suggest isn't easy but it may help. Each time you get depressed and start to feel the need to cut remember that you bear scars deeper than most of us have to bear, but each time you cut you are letting them win. It is their power that you allow them to have in your mind that makes you want to cut as if you want to cut them out of your memory. Please don't let them have that power over you, be stronger than them because they picked you out of the people they could abuse because you were too small to fight back and had no one (until your dad) to defend you.
I didn't have anything anyway close to what you have had to face but maybe if your read my story 'what's in a name' you can find another tortured soul that can help you find your strength. I am not asking for a review, I am asking for you to listen with your heart and maybe find something to help you.

As to your writing on this story if you would like to edit it as I continue to edit my horrors so that I can get it out of my head, I can give you pointers on that.
Thank you for sharing a difficult story.
Renvek aka Alan

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

I can tell this was very much written from the heart, and it is very brave for you to share this. I'm sorry to hear that your mom didn't believe you. in fact, I'm angry on your behalf; why would anyone lie about something like that?

[Daniel Sala]

This is a very good way of dealing with the pain, a well-written account of why you do that, it really helps for otherts to understand what's behind it, even if it is upsetting for others to read. Good story, Stephanie.

[child of God]

Thank you ...

[Daniel Sala]

Thank you, my pleasure!

[SANDEEP SHETTY]

i am sorry for you, broken girl....this one was touching...!!

[Sue Hart]

For whatever reason you wrote it, it was quite emotional. The story was good. The structure could be improved upon just by re-reading what you've written. Making the sentences complete. Simple things help the reader focus. But it's the message that's important and you did that very well.

[child of God]

Thank you I'll look back and look for those errors and correct them

[child of God]

O and I am now perfectly safe now with my ma and dad so no worry I just have nightmares sometime and have a bunch of triggers for panic attacks but I'm safe that's all that matters now I guess