My body is a canvas

Trying not to cut is so hard.

These scars I wear are who I am,

A faded piece of art.

A tight fit that clings to me,

Reminders of my past.

Hidden shall they remain,

For fear the world will see who I truly am.

Battle scars on my hips, 

Were once a cry of pain.

Each slash shows my weakness,

Each rip shows my hate.

I knew that I had to stop,

Although I could not.

I tried and tried,

And succeeded,

But now I find,

I'm at square one,

All alone without my knife,

But I still will carry on.

They energy boils through me,

My hands ripple madly,

I need to,

I need to,

But I know that I must not.

These scars I wear are beautiful,

And how I wish to add to them.

An unfinished symphony shall I remain.

I want to wear them proudly,

I want to show no fear,

But I'll stay back behind you,

Never truly there.

Author's Note

I wrote this while trying not to cut, it's so hard not to.

I know this poem sucks, but deal with it. I'll write what I want, when I want.
I haven't cut for about two weeks, but it's getting really tough.

Reviews

[fireblossom]

This poem does NOT suck. It shines like a lyric.

It's open and honest and true. Those scars are beautiful because they are part of you. As you note in this poem, the fact they served their purpose does not mean you need to continue that way of acting. There are one hundred stepping stones leading across the pond. Sometimes we trip and step back one stone or two...but we don't stay there we move on until we are across the pond.

Your poem shows the journey of a noble person who wants to make it across this pond and a thousand more.

Thanks for sharing our journey.

[sammyj]

yes, I like this piece very much, i like it...

[brianna vega]

your talented keep it up
your not a bad writer age means nothing so hush about that and keep writing anyone who says your not good is an ignorant fool and probably reads crap like twilight your much better than most people on this site.

[EverEmma]

This is gorgeous. I am sitting here saying to my self " Oh, my, gosh". This is seriously amazing. You are brilliant, completely and utterly brilliant. You use your pain and sorrow and desire to cut as tools for writing. You vent well. Im not congratulating you, im crying with you. Resisting with you. My heart goes out to you.

[Kes]

Rosy. Seriously this is like... wow.

I know you're struggling - you've told me enough times, but keep on struggling forward. I know you can beat it. And if you give in... well I don't know what I'll do but it'll be something nasty!
But honestly, I do know it's hard for you. I can't imagine how hard, but I know it's hard. I still think you can work your way through it. You need to dream of a better place, a better time, and then hold on. Hold on to that dream like it's your lungs and don't ever EVER let go until that dream is reality. You can make it happen. I swear to it - You'll find a better way to vent your frustrations and your hurt and your sorrow and pain and grief and hatred and anger. You will. Eventually.

But about the poem - this is beautiful. I can see how those scars could be ugly, but oh-so-beautiful at the same time. I can see that through this. You're an amazing writer, you know that? And (although i love some of your other poems to death) this poem is my new favourite... It's certainly one of the best I've read in a long time!
You've got such a great talent in writing, Rosy... I'm so jealous!

[JC]

very powerful and strong, ahead of your years. keep writing, you have the knack.

[Elizabeth]

This poem doesn't suck. Never apologize for your work. You're an artist. You have every right to say what you damn well please.

Now on to the poem: I dealt with this for many years. This poem clearly brings to mind the sick merry go round we ride when we struggle with the notion of escaping through cutting. You have done an excellent job of creating sharp images (forgive my pun) and the tone is haunting.
On a personal note, I am proud of you. And I will continue to be proud of you no matter what you do.

[HappyAccident]

Wow for so young this is amazing.I am a cutter too so I get this in its entirety .You wanna stop ,but then again you love the way the scars look

[Paris France]

This is a beautiful poem, yet at the same time my heart wants to break because this piece is so full of emotion. I Love the rhythmic flow and your wonderful word choice. And I agree with Amelia, God will give you the strength you need! Feel free to message me, I love to talk!
Keep up the great writing and chin up!
God bless : )

[Amelia Harris]

This is a deeply emotional poem, my heart goes out to you. You have a wonderful gift of expression, I can fully feel your troubled spirit. Hang in there my friend, God will give you strength.
Love, Amelia : )