Today

Wishes won’t come true, today

today
today I wish I wasn’t a musician
because music is what I love
but music makes me feel.

today i wish i wasn’t a writer
because we are my every thought
And now I remain a lonely blank page

today I wish I wasn’t so tired
because I can’t close my eyes
without seeing memories that i can’t forget

today I wish I could eat
appetite is lost
along with most everything I need

today I wish I wouldn’t have stopped at my parents
a reminder of the beginning
longing for another moment

today I wish eyes weren’t filled with color
and tears as well
pain isn’t a lover, but more of a monster.

today I wish mirrors would reflect
what could’ve been,
instead of what I see
I hate what I see.

Today I regret who I am
but not who you are.

Today I wish the sun would’ve went down sooner
So tomorrow could come
And treat me better than today.

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[John the Baptist]

Yes, there are days when there is no consolation. Even in the pit of pain, though, there is learning, if we can make ourselves be open to it.