I Might be Pregnant

This is a play I wrote for my schools 24 hour play festival. I wrote it in about a half hour so please be kind I only had four hours to write several skits. The theme was oops/I might be...

I might be Pregnant

By Jayfray

Wanda: A middle aged women who in fact might be pregnant (southern)

Jeff: Her fiancée who isn’t ready for commitment (southern)

Wanda’s Mom: she wants Jeff to get off his lazy a*s and commit to her daughter (southern granny)

(The scene opens to Wanda holding a pregnancy test in her hand)

Wanda:

S**t

(Black out…the scene resets to Wanda and Wanda’s mother)

Wanda:

Mamma something terrible is happening

Mamma:

What is it baby?

Wanda:

(Pauses for a second) mamma I’m pregnant

Mamma:

Why that’s wonderful darling! Where’s the ring?

Wanda:

(Remorseful) Mamma there is no ring

Mamma:

(Suddenly angry) WHAT?! WHY THAT…(she begins to cuss and swear and ramble on) DIRTY ROTTEN NO GOOD RACOON STEALING VERMIN FROM KENTUCKY!

Wanda:

Oh mamma don’t be angry

Mamma:

(Suddenly) Don’t worry baby mammas not angry (angry again) mammas furious (she gets up and rummages through a dresser) where’s my shot gun

Wanda:

Oh mamma stop please

Mamma:

If he won’t propose ill make him (still rummaging)

(Suddenly Jeff enters)

Jeff:

Wanda so I just got your text I’m sorry I’m late

Mamma:

Hey Jeff guess who else is late?

(Jeff being really dumb doesn’t understand the connotation behind that)

Jeff:

Who? Is there a party or something?

Mamma:

(Jaw dropped) you are dumber then a possum in the middle of the rode aint you?

Wanda:

(Patting to the spot next to her) Jeff please sit down

Jeff:

(Awkwardly sits down) what’s up?

Wanda:

You see Jeff I uhm….i……i…uhm

Mamma:

Oh for petes sake

Pete:

(pokes his out off stage) Yes?

Mamma:

Nobody asked you pete

(pete pops his head off)

Jeff:

Ok what is going on?

Mamma:

Oh for petes (looks around thinking its clear) sake

Pete:

(poking his head out) Yes?

Mamma:

Oh shove it pete….Jeff Wanda’s pregnant

(Jeff looks at Wanda Dumb founded)

Wanda:

(intervening) Might be! (fumbling for words) these things aren’t always accurate

Jeff:

Oh….

Wanda:

I took another test a few minutes ago it should be done soon

(she looks down at the test)

Wanda:

Its done (she let’s out a big sigh of relief) It’s negative!

Jeff:

Thank pete!

Pete:

(poking his head out) You’re welcome

Mamma:

That’s it where’s my shot gun!

(scene)

Author's Note

I wrote this in a half hour please be kind.

Reviews

[adekmrsuy]

I think this would be fun to preform. I like Pete's character and how you used stage directions to add to the humor.

[jayfray]

thank you Akroma

[Akroma]

Hehe, I like! Gotta love the south...