Widespread Apologies

Please read, this is not as long as it looks, its mostly pictures.

To my dear dad,

I'm sorry that I love you

I'm sorry I always badger you about your packs and drinks

I'm sorry that in a competition between cigarettes and alcohol, and me, I lose.

I'm sorry you aren't a poet anymore

I'm sorry you never come visit me on weekends and holidays

I'm sorry that you worry me,

But I'm mostly sorry that if you don't turn your life around, I won't see you before you die.

To my grandparents,

I'm sorry if you think I'm being snappy

I'm sorry if you think I've lost tolerance for family traditions

I'm sorry if I've disappointed you

I'm sorry if you disapprove of my computer time

I'm sorry if you're angry with my generation

I'm sorry if you hate me but mom and I still need to live with you

But I'm mostly sorry that we can't have a good relationship in your final years.

To my cousin Alexis,

I'm sorry that we grew up together

I'm sorry that I'm older than you by only three months and that makes you angry

I'm sorry we were so close

I'm sorry that you hate me for my lack of popularity now.

I'm sorry that I miss talking to you

I'm sorry that I'm more mature than you

But most of all I'm sorry you've gotten yourself into drugs and alcohol and won't ask for help.

To my mother

I'm sorry I didn't put you above Alexis

I'm sorry I don't want you to baby me anymore

I'm sorry I want my privacy

I'm sorry our relationship is rocky

I'm sorry it took so long to tell you my heart hurt

I'm sorry I don't want you in my life so much

But most of all I'm sorry I'm not your best friend anymore.

To my best friend Abby,

I'm sorry you think I'm intruding on your privacy

I'm sorry you think I'm trying to ruin your life

I'm sorry I want to protect you at all costs

I'm sorry I love you

I'm sorry you think I'm a bad friend

I'm sorry I want you to trust me for real

But most of all I'm sorry we aren't what we used to be

To my other best friend Tiara,

I'm sorry I couldn't save your grandpa from his cancer

I'm sorry I'm the only one you can talk to about your feelings

I'm sorry I don't always know what to do

I'm sorry I love you

I'm sorry I want to make sure you're happy

But most of all, I'm sorry I can't always be with you

And an overall apology to everybody,

I'm sorry I existed in your life,

And I'm sorry I'm not good enough.

I'm sorry I've caused ripples.

Reviews

[Jeremia]

You have so much going for you. You are gifted, now is the time to realize that. Don't let sorrows hold you back. Don't fear love. Pour it out among the people, you know they need it. Don't fear change. If you lose something, it is to make a space for something bigger and better. Look forward to the dawn of that new day, when your beauty will find a way. You are a gift!

[Riley Bray]

Thank you Jeremia. Thanks also for the review, and I choose not to lose anything, that means I wont lose them either.

[Jeremia]

Well, I hope you are right.

[Acucena G.]

simply beautifull

[Riley Bray]

Thanks :)

[Acucena G.]

you are welcome

[Tai Ryens]

Your ending gave me chills. I was, cold as I may be, expecting this to be some suicide note written long ago. It caught me unexpectedly, and that exceeded all of my expectations combined. Most other writers describe their lives as ripples, but I see you've chosen a different approach. You feel as if your own sorrow, your tears, is what caused the ripples to go about this ocean of life.

[Riley Bray]

You're not at all wrong in your description about how I felt about the ripples and whatnot. Thank you very much for the review. :)

[Horizon K.]

Wow, I don't even have words for this....so incredibly sad. It is inevitable, we will always hurt every person we love in some way, at some point in time. I cant think of a single instance for myself where that hasn't been true. But its because we love someone, its that caring that creates the rough edges, where we wish for things to be better, wish for things to be different, and those wishes feel like disappointment and hurt to someone who wants to be accepted just as they are, even if they do need help.

Don't stop loving and don't stop making ripples. Sometimes, its those ripples that are just what we need to be woken up...

And the writing of this was beautiful, but it so hard to say that... when something so profoundly sad is written beautifully... what is beauty then?

[Riley Bray]

Yes, you're right. While it may be sad we will have hurt everyone we've met at some point. Interesting question about beauty, and clearly I can't answer it either haha. Thanks for the review.