Dementia

12/9/15

My grandpa says goodbye

To no one in particular each and every night

He does not remember me

He does not get that flash of recognition

When I bring breakfast to his bedside every morning

I must remind him of my identity

And wait for my heart to break anew

When he asks for his sister

Who I know died back many years ago

I'll smile and ask him about her

Telling him I haven't met her yet

His present is my past

And I will not be the one to disillusion him

Every day he gets to fall in love all over again

He thinks that grandma is beautiful still

But does not remember marrying her

That just keeps his love as fresh and strong as it used to be

And it's so cute to see because his eyes are clear when he looks at her

I must say I'm jealous I've become a stranger to him

As he used to be able to tell countless stories

He spoke of struggle and war and movements

And how he was a man of many talents

A father of five and grandfather of six

He had much to say

And a large imagination to fabricate what he could not remember

He doesnt know any of that now

There are days where I'll tell him my hero was him

But these days he is too far gone

And I cannot allow myself to disrupt the peace he's found

His mind is just a shadow of what it used to be, now,

And sadly it fades just a little more

With every passing day