unforgettable

10.01.21

7.21pm

.

I wasn’t always like this,

But as each day passes,

My mind weakens,

And with it �" for I fear my life to follow, so does my will to live,

.

Neither here, nor there-

Dr. Suess’ protégé,

Won’t you stay here for a moment; a short tempered second?

Yes, I may as well be gone, but I have so much to experience,

You should know that I am happy,

But in this house, I fear I no longer recognize who I am,

.

With each glance into the mirror,

I fall further and further behind,

Each step that I take, is one step behind my shadows’,

.

Who I used to be still lingers in these walls,

Running, laughing �" playing,

So, in her youth - in her venture, in her steed,

Her eyes, continuing to glisten over pretty, shiny things,

Her neck, wrists and ankles continuing to be adorned by jewels aplenty,

She used to be so loved,

So adored,

So cherished,

.

It still haunts me, the ghosts of 2012 lingers in shadows when I dream,

The echoes of my brother’s cries’ are locked in a box in my mind,

Do you think me the culprit?

That I wanted this?

Their contents play,

Like a music box, though �" nobody ever really intended to crank the handle,

.

I keep all the tears that were stolen from me, from us,

I wasn’t always like this,

.

*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡

.

I suffer from delirium,

There’s 7 other lives that I remember,

Specifically, the only thing I remember are the moments of death,

Betrayal, their names,

Their names are the most important part,

.

*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡

.

I wasn’t always like this �" I know, I’ve seen the home videos,

I was energetic, my voice �" is the one thing I never forgot about,

It has changed so much over the years,

.

My body has changed �" too �" so much over the years,

It has become more seen �" heavier,

No doubt, soaked with all the secrets-

.

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

I was not always like this -

.

*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡

 

What happened to my face?

.

I was not always like this -

…

__

Khat, observing herself as an obscurity in retrospect